The Wilderness Years 2

Whole Again

by BeeBee

URL: http://www.area52hkh.net/asb/beebee/wyears02.php
Summary: Jack and Daniel have to learn to live together again.

Why don't you just move in here?" Daniel said as he watched Jack searching for his uniform among the pile of clothes littering Daniel's bedroom.

Jack stopped what he was doing and looked at Daniel in surprise.

"Well most of your stuff seems to be here," Daniel said indicating the piles, "and you spend most of your time here when you're not at the SGC."

Jack looked at his watch. "Can we talk about this tonight?" he suggested, realising he was going to be late for a meeting if he didn't hurry up.

Daniel nodded, smiling as he watched Jack turn from the gentle lover of the previous night into the Air Force General both loved and feared by most of the staff at Cheyenne Mountain.

"Why not, I'll cook dinner for eight, will that be okay?"

Jacked returned the smile, drinking in the sight of the tousled archaeologist.

Daniel wasn't going into the SGC that day, sometimes, if he had a hospital appointment, he worked from home and this was one of those days.

"Perfect," Jack said as he brushed down his jacket and stooping, checked his appearance in the hall mirror, a little low for a six foot General but the perfect height for a wheelchair bound archaeologist.

"Is that you or dinner?" Daniel asked amused.

"Actually I was referring to you," Jack teased, pleased to see he could still bring a flush to Daniel's cheeks.

Once Jack had left the house Daniel busied himself, tidying up as best he could, before showering and dressing and heading off for his hospital appointment. These routine hospital visits enabled Dr Dhillon to monitor Daniel's physical condition, check his bladder for any signs of infection and iron out any little problems that Daniel might be having before they blossomed into something more serious.

If Daniel had thought that once he had been released from the hospital and rehabilitation centre he had done with doctors and therapists he would have been very much mistaken. Dr Dhillon had impressed upon Daniel the importance of looking after himself, ensuring he changed his catheter regularly to prevent infection, altered his position regularly to prevent pressure sores, had routine physiotherapy to prevent loss of muscle tone and help with his breathing and circulation.

Daniel had eventually managed to incorporate all this into his already busy schedule of work at the SGC and now into his new relationship with Jack O'Neill. It was a juggling act but one that Daniel was adept at.

"So any problems?" Dr Dhillon asked as Daniel deftly transferred from the couch back into his chair and lifted his paralysed feet onto the footrests.

"No, everything's fine," Daniel said adjusting his butt on the special gel cushion.

"How's your relationship going?" Dr Dhillon asked carefully. He knew that Daniel and Jack had been lovers before the accident and that Jack had recently come back into Daniel's life and he was curious as to how the pair were dealing with the new situation they found themselves in. Until recently Daniel had only had to care for himself, now with Jack O'Neill on the scene the doctor wanted to be sure that Daniel wasn't skimping on any of his procedures in order to appear 'normal' to Jack.

"Good," Daniel said, "why do you ask?"

"How is General O'Neill coping with your disabilities?" Dr Dhillon came straight to the point. Over the last couple of years he had learned that in any verbal contest Dr. Daniel Jackson was always going to be a sure-fire winner. He decided that openness was the best way to elicit any true response from Daniel.

Daniel looked at the doctor with his clear blue eyes. He had also learned that honesty was the best policy when dealing with Dr Dhillon.

"Fine so far but......."

"But?"

"Jack stays over some nights......most nights."

"But?"

"He knows I wear a catheter, but I try to change it when he isn't around, I don't like him to see all that goes with this." Daniel waved his hand encompassing the paralysed limbs and the wheelchair.

"Daniel, if you want this relationship to progress to any meaningful level you know that Jack has to be aware of all aspects of your life."

"I know, but I just don't want to frighten him off again."

"As I understand it, it wasn't you or your disability that frightened him off last time, was it?" Dr Dhillon had spoken to Jack O'Neill, he knew what had happened between the two men and he was sure that the General was strong enough and willing to deal with whatever Daniel threw at him.

"No, I guess not, I'm just........" Daniel trailed off insure how to articulate his thoughts and fears.

"You're just worried, you're in a new situation. You've learned to cope with your new life and now you have to open up and let someone else in. It's not easy Daniel but if you don't allow Jack to share everything you risk losing him."

Daniel raised worried blue eyes.

"Think about it carefully Daniel, Jack O'Neill isn't going to cut and run again I can promise you that," the doctor said, standing up and opening his office door so that Daniel could manoeuvre his chair out. Once through the door he paused and swung his chair around.

"Thanks," he said simply.

Dr Dhillon nodded. "Make another appointment for one month Daniel, see how things go, okay?"

Daniel nodded and wheeled himself towards the appointment desk. He knew the doctor was right, that he had to allow Jack access to all areas of his life and, if Jack agreed to move in, he would have to do just that.

As the nurse handed him his new appointment card Daniel decided to concentrate on what to cook for dinner that night and worry about what might happen after that later.

Daniel had just finished setting the table and was opening a bottle of wine when Jack arrived back that evening.

Jack took the bottle from him and Daniel felt a small twinge of resentment before he realised that Jack didn't want to open the bottle for him but merely wanted to see what type of wine it was.

"Nice," Jack handed the bottle back to Daniel and he finished manipulating the corkscrew and placed the open bottle on the dining table before heading back towards the stove.

"There's beer if you prefer," Daniel said as he opened the oven door and carefully lifted the casserole dish onto the wooden board placed across his thighs.

"No wine's fine with me," Jack said watching Daniel deftly manoeuvre the steaming dish from the stove to his lap and then onto the table. Jack knew that Daniel had once burned his thighs rather badly after putting a dish on his knee without realising how hot it was. Obviously with no sensation to pain it had only been the smell of burning cloth and flesh that had alerted Daniel to the problem. After a few visits to the infirmary for the burns dressing Daniel had come up with the wooden tray that now protected his paralysed limbs from similar occurrences.

"Let me," Jack said, taking the serving spoon from Daniel and digging into the aromatic casserole that Daniel had prepared earlier.

"I can do it Jack," Daniel protested, feeling the familiar annoyance he felt when anyone tried to treat him like a cripple.

"Daniel, let me," Jack insisted spooning the chicken and gravy onto the two plates. He passed one to Daniel and then sat down opposite his lover.

"I want to do things around the house Daniel, I know it's your house but I can't keep coming here every evening and letting you cook dinner for me. I want to do things for you."

He saw Daniel's face and quickly added. "Not because I don't think your capable, hell you're more than capable, I know that. No its because I love you and I want to do things for you. I would cook dinner at my house if it wasn't so damned inconvenient for you."

Daniel smiled. "Sorry, I can be a bit touchy about being helped." He paused and held out his wineglass. "You could pour me some wine," he suggested. Jack returned the smile and reached for the bottle. "A pleasure Dr. Jackson."

Later, once the table was cleared and the pair were sitting on the couch Jack broached the subject Daniel had touched on that morning.

"Did you mean what you said this morning about me moving in?" Jack asked carefully trying to gauge Daniel's reaction.

"Would you want to?" Daniel wanted nothing more than for Jack to be here with him all the time but he wasn't sure that their relationship had reached that level yet. He still found himself feeling uncomfortable about some aspects of his disability that he tried to hide from Jack. He knew Dr. Dhillon was right, if they were to make anything of their relationship they had to be totally open with one another.

Jack turned slightly so that he was facing Daniel.

"I made a big mistake a couple of years ago and I missed being with you when you needed me. I know you don't need me now, not in the same way but I need you Daniel."

Daniel's heart beat a little faster as he listened to Jack.

"I want to make up for the wasted years I was away, I want to be with you last thing at night and first thing every morning. I want to share what's left of my life with you."

Daniel dropped his eyes, refusing to meet Jack's gaze.

"It'll never be the same Jack you realise that don't you?"

"It could be better," Jack said softly putting a finger under Daniel's chin and raising his head until he could gaze straight into his deep blue eyes.

"Do you want me here?" Jack asked.

Daniel paused and licked his dry lips. "There are issues."

"Issues?" Jack was puzzled.

"Around this," Daniel indicated his paralysed legs and the nearby wheelchair.

"I don't have a problem with the chair Daniel," Jack said.

"No but I do." He took a deep breath before continuing.

"I'm embarrassed about it Jack, I don't feel comfortable with you seeing some aspects of my daily care, the catheter and......."

Jack interrupted.

"We'll work through it Daniel. There is nothing about you that I don't love, nothing you need to hide from me. I've read the books; I've talked to the doctor and the physiotherapist and to Sam. I know all there is to know about your day to day care and you don't have to keep any part of it secret, do you understand?"

Daniel nodded, it wasn't going to be easy to let go but he would try. He had missed Jack more than he missed having the use of his legs if he were truthful.

"So when are you moving your stuff in?" he asked. Jack hugged him, "as soon as possible Danny."

There were good days and there were bad days. Daniel had lived alone since he had been released from rehab and it was difficult getting used to there being another person in the house with him. He had to consider Jack's wants and needs instead of just being able to think about himself. There were meals to shop for, prepare and cook and then the clearing up. There was double the washing, Jack's clothes strewn around the bedroom, someone else to consider when deciding what to watch on TV or what time to go to bed.

Daniel groaned as he wheeled himself into the spacious bathroom and saw the pile of wet towels on the floor. This was becoming a regular occurrence, Jack getting into the bathroom first and then leaving it in a mess for when Daniel wanted to use it. Daniel wanted to have a shower and deal with his catheter but he hated trying to move around among Jack's mess. Sighing he hooked his left arm over the back of his chair to anchor himself and then leaned over to pick up the sopping towels and dump them in his lap. Balancing himself again he wheeled over to the laundry basket and threw the towels in. Once he had found some clean towels in the cupboard Daniel could get on with the laborious process of undressing, transferring onto the chair in the shower, dealing with his catheter, showering and the getting dried, dressed and back into his chair.

As he stuffed the washing into the machine and set the programme Daniel wondered whether he had done the right thing asking Jack to move in. He had never realised just how untidy his partner was until recently. Granted Jack's house had always had a very lived-in look but Daniel had liked that and always felt comfortable staying there. Nobody could call Daniel the most organised of people, his office was stuffed with books, papers and artefacts but he had his own unique system and boasted that he could find anything within a few minutes. Despite the apparent chaos of his office Daniel's apartment had always been relatively tidy, only because he spent very little time there. He was either at the SGC, off-world or staying at Jack's house.

Times change however and now wheelchair bound and living in his specially adapted home Daniel had soon realised how important it was to keep the place tidy. A chair out of place, a pile of books or clothes strewn across the floor were obstacles for Daniel to negotiate in his wheelchair. Gradually he had schooled himself to put books back on the shelves and clothes into the closet, giving himself ample space to manoeuvre his chair around.

Washing sorted Daniel made himself a pot of coffee and a decision. He would talk to Jack tonight, explain the problems he was having. He had been determined that his disability wouldn't be an issue in their new relationship. He had wanted Jack to be able to ignore the wheelchair and treat Daniel as he had before but if he didn't speak up he was going to sink beneath the piles of extra work he was doing to keep the house clean and tidy.

"So why don't you just leave it to the cleaner?" Jack had asked puzzled as Daniel explained about the bathroom and the washing.

"I don't have a cleaner Jack," Daniel said. Jack was stunned.

"So who keeps the place clean and does the washing?" he asked.

"I do."

Jack was appalled. "You mean these last couple of weeks you've been clearing up after me?"

Daniel nodded. Surely Jack knew there wasn't someone coming in and keeping the house clean.

"Daniel I don't know what to say, I just assumed........" Jack felt terrible. He had just moved in and carried on without even checking on the workings of Daniel's household.

Jack always left for the SGC before Daniel. He had responsibilities as Commander of the Base and as Daniel took longer to get ready in the morning it seemed only sensible that Jack left first. He hadn't realised that, once he had left, Daniel had to get himself up and ready and then go around tidying up, putting the washing in and doing any cleaning jobs.

"I never really needed a cleaner when I lived alone," Daniel explained. "I don't make much mess."

Jack interrupted. "But I do."

Daniel smiled, "you always did," he said but now it's more difficult for me to tidy up after you."

Jack winced, another reminder of Daniel's disability. How could he have been so insensitive? He had tried so hard to play down Daniel's disability, knowing that was how his partner wanted to play it and here he was blundering on and leaving Daniel to do all the chores.

"Okay so first thing tomorrow I employ someone to come and clean the place." Jack said. He reached across the table and took Daniel's hand in his. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay really," Daniel said "but it would be nice not to have to spend hours on the chores."

Daniel had to admit that the new cleaner Jack employed saved him a lot of work. It was nice to come home each evening and find the house clean and tidy. Jack tried to get home on time most evenings and insisted on cooking their evening meal. Every morning Jack got up first as usual and then, after having his shower, spent the next fifteen minutes banging around tidying up, throwing towels into the laundry, picking up clothes and shoes before leaving for the mountain. Although Daniel did find it easier to negotiate their bedroom and bathroom with the floors cleared he was starting to find Jack's exaggerated concern a little annoying. He didn't want to spoil their blossoming relationship by moaning again and so he took a deep breath and kept calm as he lay in bed watching Jack's antics each morning. As the days turned into weeks Daniel found it harder and harder to accept Jack's ministrations. Jack always managed to get home in time to cook the evening meal, leaving Daniel with nothing to do except watch TV until it was ready. Once the meal was over Jack jumped up and cleared the table, loading the dishwasher and putting out the trash before Daniel had time to do it himself. As bedtime drew near Jack would make sure he was first into the bathroom so that, when Daniel, emerged, the bed was turned down and the lights adjusted.

Daniel was finding that he had less and less to do other than look after his own needs. He hadn't felt so restricted or out of control since he had first regained consciousness in the infirmary after the accident. At the rehabilitation centre his whole day had been focussed on learning to do everything for himself. He had enjoyed the challenge, it had been difficult and sometimes he had despaired that he would ever be able to manage to live alone but eventually he had acquired all the necessary skills and he had enjoyed his new home. He sighed, as he watched Jack loading the dishwasher. It wasn't that he didn't like having Jack living here. It was more than he could ever have dreamed and he so wanted it to work but he had to find a way to get through to Jack. A way to make Jack aware of his abilities as well as his disabilities.

"Coffee?" Daniel asked wheeling back into the kitchen as Jack closed the dishwasher and set the programme.

"Let me just put the trash out and then I'll make you one," Jack said moving from the dishwasher to the bin.

"No I meant did you want me to make you a coffee," Daniel said.

"You just go and watch TV, I'll have one brewing in a minute," Jack continued.

"Jack."

At Daniel's tone Jack paused with the trash bag in his hand and turned to face his partner.

"Daniel?"

"I'm making the coffee, do you want one?" Daniel asked trying to keep his voice calm.

"Daniel, I'll see to it in a.........."

Daniel interrupted him. "No."

Jack was surprised at Daniel's tone but knew when to let something drop. He smiled and nodded. "Over to you then," he said opening the door and heading to the trash can.

Daniel sighed and wheeled over to the coffee machine, he gathered the necessary items and was busy setting the machine up when Jack reappeared.

"I could have done that you know," Jack commented as he leaned against the counter and watched Daniel.

Daniel paused, the coffee scoop in his hand. "Jack we need to talk about this."

"What?" Jack looked puzzled.

"Go and watch TV Jack, I'll call you when the coffee's brewed," Daniel promised.

Jack shrugged, he had no idea what Daniel was getting at, but then again, he quite often wasn't up to speed with Daniel's razor sharp brain. He settled on the couch and reached for the remote control.

Once the coffee was brewed and Daniel was settled on the couch he turned to Jack.

"We need to talk," he said causing Jack to turn worried brown eyes towards him.

"About?"

"About you trying to help me."

"I don't understand," Jack said, "I like helping you."

Daniel smiled and his blue eyes twinkled. He reached over and took Jack's hand.

"I know and I appreciate it really, it's just......." Daniel paused he didn't know how to explain without upsetting Jack.

Luckily Jack wasn't quite as clueless as he tried to make out.

"I do too much for you don't I?"

Daniel nodded. "It's not that I don't like you doing things for me, some things, but sometimes you make me feel like an invalid."

"I guess I just want to make life easier for you," Jack admitted.

"I love having you here Jack, I want to share my life with you, all my life but I need to lead a normal life. I might be in a wheelchair but I'm not incapable, I can do things for myself."

Jack nodded. He leaned over and kissed Daniel gently on his lips. "I love being here Daniel, I just want to do everything I can for you."

"Then treat me like you used to," Daniel suggested. "I need you to make me feel more confident, more able to do everything; to make me feel less disabled."

"I'll try," Jack promised.

"That's all I ask," Daniel said reaching for his coffee cup.

"Jack swallowed his lukewarm coffee in one gulp. "Drink up Dr. Jackson, I think you need a touch of the Jack O'Neill charm tonight."

Daniel laughed, "ready when you are," he teased holding up his arms to allow Jack to carry him into the bedroom.

~~~

Jack tried, he really did, but he still couldn't bring himself to watch Daniel struggle to do some task that he could do faster and with a lot less effort. Daniel did his best to cover up his annoyance and although things weren't ideal both men kept their feelings to themselves and rubbed along as best they could.

Daniel came home from work one evening to find Jack sprawled on the couch and no sign of a meal being prepared.

"Jack?"

Daniel wheeled nearer to the couch and shook Jack gently. He came awake with a start.

"Whaaat?"

"Take it easy," Daniel suggested, "headache?"

"Yeah," Jack admitted, struggling to sit up and rubbing his temples.

"Stay put," Daniel ordered before heading into the bathroom and grabbing a bottle of Tylenol.

"Try these," Daniel's voice woke Jack from his doze and he opened his eyes to see a concerned Daniel offering him two Tylenol and a glass of water.

Jack swallowed the pills and handed the empty glass back to Daniel. "I should start supper," he said making no attempt to get off the couch.

"I'll see to it, you stay there," Daniel said pushing Jack back down on the couch and then wheeling into the kitchen.

Daniel quite enjoyed having the kitchen to himself without Jack hovering and helping. He soon had two plates of spaghetti steaming on the table and, satisfying himself that everything was in order, he went to tell Jack.

Jack was asleep, sprawled on the couch, snoring gently. Daniel shook his head with fond exasperation. He touched Jack's cheek and was concerned to find how hot it was. With some cajoling Daniel finally woke Jack and persuaded him to try to eat something. After a couple of forkfuls Jack shook his head.

"Sorry Daniel, it's delicious but I've no appetite tonight."

"I think you need to see a doctor Jack," Daniel said, his blue eyes full of concern.

"Nah, just a bug, be okay tomorrow," Jack said pushing himself upright and swaying slightly as a wave of dizziness washed over him.

"Jack?"

"Going to bed, can you manage to clear up?" Jack asked heading towards the bedroom.

"Leave it to me," Daniel said to Jack's retreating back before starting to stack the dishwasher.

By the time Daniel had finished tidying the kitchen, emptied the trash and locked up for the night Jack was fast asleep. Daniel left the bottle of Tylenol and a glass of water on the bedside table and slipped into bed next to his snoring partner.

The following morning Daniel woke to find Jack still asleep, tangled in the sheets. He touched Jack's forehead concerned to find how hot he was. Jack groaned and opened his eyes.

"I feel awful," he said kicking at the sheets wrapped around his legs.

"Yeah, you look awful," Daniel agreed. "Shall I tell the SGC you won't be in today?"

Jack's only response was to fling the covers off and make a quick dash to the bathroom where he threw up last night's supper. Once he was sure he had finished heaving Jack made his way back into the bedroom and sat on the side of the bed, his head in his hands.

"Here, take these," Daniel ordered, holding out two Tylenol. Once he was satisfied Jack had swallowed the pills Daniel pushed Jack back onto the pillows and threw the sheets back over him.

"Thanks," Jack muttered as he curled up on his side and pulled the sheets around his shoulders.

Daniel lifted his legs over the side of the bed and transferred into his chair. He decided to make some coffee and toast and ring Janet Fraiser before he showered and so, once he had dealt with his catheter and, as it was still a little too early to bother Janet, he wheeled into the kitchen and set a tray for Jack.

Once the coffee was brewed and the toast buttered Daniel carefully lifted the tray onto his lap and wheeled himself carefully back into the bedroom. Thank goodness for flat surfaces, Daniel thought as he negotiated his house, trying not to spill anything on the tray.

Unfortunately Jack didn't seem to appreciate Daniel's offering of breakfast in bed, merely groaning and turning slightly green at the sight of the tray. Daniel shrugged and poured himself a large cup of coffee.

"Fraiser!" Janet answered the phone in her office, holding the receiver on her shoulder and she tried to remove her coat at the same time.

"Janet, it's me Daniel. Jack's sick."

"What are his symptoms?" Janet asked calmly, reaching for a pad and pen. Once Daniel had explained Janet relaxed.

"Don't worry Daniel a lot of people on the Base have it, it's just a 48 hour virus. Keep him warm, dose him with Tylenol and make him drink plenty of water. He should be just fine in a couple of days."

Daniel was relieved to hear it was nothing more serious.

"How are you feeling?" Janet asked.

"I'm fine," Daniel reassured her. "Can you let someone know that I won't be in for a couple of days, I'll keep an eye on Jack."

Janet smiled; it was just like old times. "I'll do that Daniel, now take care of yourself as well as the General won't you."

After assuring Janet that they would both be just fine he replaced the receiver and headed back into the bedroom to check on his patient.

Daniel managed to shower and dress before Jack started throwing up again. He hovered anxiously as Jack wiped his face and pushed himself up from the toilet rim.

"Stay in bed Jack please, I'll get a bowl," Daniel suggested but Jack shook his head as he curled back up under the covers, shivering slightly.

Daniel spent the day working on the computer with the doors open so that he could hear if Jack needed him. He offered drinks and soup throughout the day, most of which were rejected immediately and some that Jack managed to force down, waited and made their reappearance some time later.

Later that night, when Daniel finally heaved himself into bed Jack groaned and turned to face his companion.

"Sorry about this," he croaked, "you shouldn't have to look after me."

"I like looking after you Jack," Daniel said smiling and leaning over to plant a chaste kiss of Jack's hot brow.

"Thanks." Jack was asleep before Daniel had time to say anything and, tucking the blanket around his partner Daniel settled down to sleep.

Daniel had only just drifted off to sleep when he was awoken by the sound of Jack groaning. Daniel pushed himself into a sitting position and peered at his companion.

"Jack what's the matter?" he asked, alarmed at Jack's pale face beaded with sweat.

"Stomach cramps," Jack managed to grind out from between clenched teeth before another spasm made him groan again.

"What can I do?" Daniel asked, unsure what help he could offer.

"Nothing, just going to the bathroom," Jack said struggling out of bed and, holding his stomach with one hand, steadied himself on the bedroom wall before lurching towards the bathroom.

Daniel listened to the sounds of Jack's sickness. For the first time in a while he felt frustrated at his disability. He wanted to help Jack but had no idea what he could do. Eventually Jack crawled back into bed and, groaning loudly, pulled the blanket up.

"Jack are you okay?" Daniel whispered, unsure if his companion had already fallen asleep.

"For now." Jack was pretty sure he hadn't finished visiting the bathroom but, for now, his stomach had settled slightly and he prayed for a few hours respite from the constant purging.

Less than an hour later Jack woke to the now familiar pain in his guts. He pushed back the covers and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He didn't want to wake Daniel; there was nothing he could do to help. Jack knew he just had the ride it out for the next few hours.

Daniel woke to hear Jack groaning and, as the bathroom light was on, Daniel deduced that Jack was feeling ill again.

"Jack are you okay in there?" Daniel called. When the only response was another groan Daniel pushed back the covers, hurriedly transferred into his chair and propelled himself into the bathroom to find Jack crouched on the floor holding his stomach. Gagging at the stench in the room Daniel wheeled his chair forward towards Jack and nudged his prostrate form with the footrest of the chair. When there was little response other than another groan Daniel tried again.

"Jack you have to get up," Daniel pleaded, nudging him again.

"Go back to bed Daniel," Jack whispered, curling up on the floor.

"Jack you can't stay there," Daniel looked around for ways to get Jack up off the floor but he had no idea what he could do other than call Sam or Janet to come over and hoist him up but, looking at Jack's current state, Daniel didn't think he would appreciate anyone else seeing him.

"Jack you're going to have to help me here," Daniel said pushing his footrest into Jack's thigh with more force this time.

"Whaaaat?" Jack opened his eyes and peered up at Daniel's worried face.

"I need to get you back into bed but you're going to have to help me."

"Whaaat?" Daniel sighed with frustration.

"Get up Jack," he yelled at the man curled at his feet. "Get up and hang on to my chair."

Daniel's words finally registered and Jack, with much groaning, finally pulled himself on to his knees and reached for the armrest of Daniel's wheelchair.

"That's it get right up Jack and hold onto the back of the chair," Daniel coaxed. He was worried that if Jack tried to pull himself upright on the armrest that he would tip the chair over and Daniel would be stuck on the bathroom floor as well.

It took a while but eventually Jack was on his feet, swaying slightly but clinging onto the back of Daniel's chair.

"Okay follow me," Daniel said, releasing the brakes and propelled himself slowly forward towards the bedroom.

It was a strange procession Daniel wheeling slowly forward while Jack clung onto the back of the chair for dear life. It was hard work, Jack was no lightweight and he was putting most of this weight onto the chair. Daniel was, in effect, pushing two people and, by the time he had reached the bedside, he was sweating and his arms were trembling.

"Okay, get into bed Jack," Daniel gasped, panting with the effort of getting Jack from the bathroom to the bedroom.

Jack obliged by letting go of Daniel's chair and falling in a heap on the bed. Daniel managed to pull back the covers and, shoving Jack's legs onto the bed, he threw the blanket over the prostrate man and then sat back in his chair and wiped the film of sweat from his brow.

Once Daniel had recovered from the exertion he considered whether it was worth getting into bed himself. He guessed that Jack would need to go to the bathroom again soon and he couldn't face the effort involved in getting himself out of his chair and into bed only to have to reverse the procedure when that happened. Once he was sure Jack was asleep, he pulled a spare blanket out of the closet and wrapped it around himself, resigned to a night in his chair.

It was a long night. Jack woke at intervals during the night and Daniel helped him to and from the bathroom. On a couple of occasions, while Jack was getting up close and personal with the toilet bowl, Daniel struggled to change the sheets on their bed. In between times, while Jack slept, Daniel tried to doze in his chair. He wasn't very successful, he had to remember to shift his butt regularly to prevent pressure sores and his arms and neck were aching from the exertion of dragging Jack around as well as himself. Eventually dawn broke and Daniel, giving up on any more sleep, wheeled into the kitchen and made himself a pot of strong black coffee.

Daniel didn't fancy taking a shower in the bathroom until it had been thoroughly cleaned and so he had to content himself with changing his catheter and brushing his teeth. The cleaning lady arrived and, after brushing aside Daniel's apologies for the state of the bathroom and bedroom, she set about the cleaning and disinfecting. By the time she had set the bathroom to rights and Daniel had showered and was getting dressed Jack was awake.

"God what a night," he groaned as he watched Daniel pulling trousers onto his useless legs.

"How are you feeling?" Daniel paused in his dressing and looked anxiously at his partner.

"Rough."

"I'll get you some breakfast when I've finished here," Daniel promised as he continued the slow process of getting dressed.

Jack watched in silence as Daniel struggled to feed useless limbs into trousers, socks and shoes. He had usually gone to work or was in the kitchen making breakfast while Daniel dressed. It was more of an effort than he had realised he thought as he watched Daniel sweating slightly as he finally lifted his feet onto the footrests and adjusted his butt on the gel cushion before releasing the brakes and propelling himself towards the bedside.

"So what do you fancy?" Daniel asked.

"You."

Daniel blushed slightly and smiled. "For breakfast."

"Just some juice."

Totally ignoring Jack's request Daniel prepared a tray with juice, tea and toast, which he carefully carried back into the bedroom and deposited on Jack's knee.

Although Jack turned a shade green when he saw the toast he did manage to eat a slice and drink all the juice and tea. Daniel nodded; satisfied that Jack was on the mend.

"Do you think you could get up and lie on the couch while Josie cleans the bedroom?" Daniel asked, once Jack had made an unsteady but unassisted trip to the bathroom.

He was relieved when Jack nodded and, grabbing a towelling robe from behind the door, headed slowly for the couch and sank down on it groaning.

"I feel as weak as a kitten," he complained as Daniel passed him an afghan.

"Well I think you're over the worst now," Daniel said wincing as his aching neck and shoulders spasmed.

"You okay?" Jack asked noticing Daniel's discomfort.

"Yeah just a bit stiff, you know," Daniel replied rubbing his neck.

"I'm sorry Daniel, you shouldn't have had to look after me."

"Why on earth not?" Daniel turned blue eyes on Jack.

"Well, you know......" Jack tailed off. He knew exactly where this conversation was heading and he was too weak to battle it out with Daniel.

"I'm in a wheelchair because my legs are paralysed, I'm not helpless. I can help myself and I can help you." Daniel's blue eyes blazed.

"Sorry, sorry." Jack held up his hands in mock surrender.

Daniel's anger evaporated. "No I'm sorry, I shouldn't be so touchy," Daniel admitted. He wheeled his chair towards the telephone. "Now I'd better ring Janet and let her know how you are."

"Tell her I've had a great nurse and feel much better," Jack ordered, settling back on the couch with the TV remote.

Jack continued to improve over the next couple of days. Daniel took the opportunity to catch up on the physiotherapy he had missed while looking after Jack. He knew he had spent far too long sitting in his chair and that he needed to stand. A spare bedroom had been turned into a mini-gym with various items of equipment including parallel bars. Once Jack had helped him strap on his braces and hoisted him into an upright position Daniel 'walked' between the bars to improve his muscle tone and circulation. On other occasions he abandoned his chair in favour of lying on his stomach on the couch watching the History Channel while Jack caught up on some SGC work he had had delivered to their home.

"Back to work tomorrow then?" Daniel checked one day as Jack prepared their lunch.

"Yeah, better show them that I'm still alive," Jack joked as he chopped herbs for the omelettes he was preparing. "What about you?"

Daniel nodded. "There will be a pile of stuff on my desk by now and I only stayed home to look after you."

"And you did a great job," Jack admitted smiling over at his partner.

Daniel continued to watch the TV news until Jack came in with the plates and then he wheeled over to the table. As soon as he saw the steaming herb omelette Daniel knew he was in trouble. A wave of nausea washed over him and his mouth filled with bile. He swallowed.

"Daniel?" Jack noticed how pale Daniel had gone. "You okay?"

"Not really hungry," Daniel admitted, reaching for the glass of water and sipping it carefully willing his stomach to settle.

Jack looked worried. This is what he had dreaded, Daniel catching the virus. He had secretly checked with Janet how Daniel's body would react to such violent sickness and had hoped and prayed that the bug would give his partner a miss. Now, looking at the greenish tinge to Daniel'' skin, Jack knew they weren't going to be so lucky.

"I think you've caught the bug Daniel," Jack said sympathetically as he removed the uneaten omelette from under Daniel's nose.

"Oh no," Daniel was dismayed. He knew, as well as Jack what it would mean. He had little or no control over his bladder and bowels at the best of times and he had seen how Jack had been affected. He moved away from the table.

"Where are you going?" Jack asked curiously.

"I'd better get to the infirmary you don't want to have to look after me here," Daniel said heading towards the bedroom to pack a bag. Jack jumped up and stood in front of Daniel's chair.

"I do want to look after you, you did it for me," Jack said blocking Daniel's way.

"Jack please......" Daniel didn't want to have to explain all the unpleasant details of what would happen.

"Daniel you are going to get into bed and let me take care of you. I'll ring Janet and get her to bring what we need but there is no way in hell I'm letting you suffer this alone in the infirmary, understand?"

Daniel dipped his head in embarrassment but he knew when he was beat. "Okay," he said quietly.

~~~

It was a rough few days. Once Jack had Daniel tucked up in bed he had contacted Janet Fraiser and she had brought plenty of supplies over with her. A waterproof mattress cover, a stock of incontinence pads, medicines, creams and powders to help keep Daniel's skin clean and dry and all the apparatus necessary to set up a glucose IV.

"Do you know what you are letting yourself in for?" Janet asked as she piled the supplies up on the table.

"I think so," Jack said carefully. Truth be told he wasn't sure he could cope but he knew this was the make or break moment in his relationship with Daniel. If he could convince Daniel that nothing whatsoever about him or his disability was distasteful then they could move to a new level in their relationship.

Janet nodded. I'll be back first thing in the morning, call me if you need anything," she added as she patted Jack's arm and headed for the door.

Once Jack had watched her drive away, he closed and locked the front door. He popped his head into the bedroom and check on Daniel and found his patient sleeping. As he had no idea how long it would be before the full force of the symptoms hit Jack decided to get some essential supplies together and then get some sleep himself.

Daniel groaning and struggling to get upright in bed awaked him in the late evening. Jack leapt into action helping Daniel into his chair and pushing him quickly into the bathroom. As night turned into day Jack moved from helping Daniel into his chair, to lifting him into it, then to carrying his patient into the bathroom and finally to refusing to allow Daniel to get out of bed at all and employing all the equipment Janet had provided to keep Daniel clean and fresh between bouts of sickness.

True to her work Janet arrived later the following morning with fresh supplies and, after greeting Jack, went into the bedroom to check on Daniel. She replaced the nearly empty IV with a full one and then gently placed her cool fingertips on Daniel's forehead to check his temperature. At her touch Daniel groaned and opened bleary blue eyes. "How are you feeling?" Janet asked moving her fingers to check his pulse.

"Awful," Daniel had to admit. His paralysis meant he wasn't suffering the same stomach cramps that Jack had but, even without the pain, he still felt terrible.

Janet nodded sympathetically. "I've added some medication to your IV which should help."

"Good."

Janet visited daily to check on Daniel's progress and how Jack was coping.

"I need to check you for possible pressure sores if that's okay," Janet said one day, waiting for Daniel's permission. He nodded and tried to turn himself over in the bed but was alarmed to find he was too weak.

Janet noticed his concern. "Don't worry Daniel you're bound to feel weak, let me help." Quickly and efficiently Janet soon had Daniel on his side, checking his rear for any signs of pressure sores starting.

"Everything looks fine, Jack's doing a great job," Janet said as he gently turned Daniel over and rearranged the bedcovers.

"Where is he?" Daniel asked looking around for his friend.

"Just doing a few household chores while you have Janet to keep an eye on you," Jack said entering the bedroom with a pile of neatly folded and freshly laundered sheets.

Daniel tried to remember just how many times Jack had changed the sheets over the past couple of days. After the first few hours it had all become a blur to Daniel. All he knew was that Jack was there with him constantly, wiping him, changing him, holding him. He winced at the memories.

"Well as I can see you are in capable hands, I'll get off and find some really sick people," Janet said snapping her medical bag shut and leaning over to plant a kiss of Daniel's forehead.

Once Jack had waved Janet off he came back into the bedroom and sat on the side of the bed, looking carefully at Daniel.

"I think you look a bit better," he finally said. "How are you feeling?"

Daniel considered the question. "Actually I think Janet's meds are working, I feel a bit better."

"Coffee? Tea? Toast?"

"Juice."

Jack patted Daniel's cheek and headed off to fulfil the request. He returned with a glass of apple juice and, after helping Daniel into a semi-sitting position, he handed over the glass and watched Daniel drain it.

"More?"

"Later, give that chance to see whether it's going to stay put or not," Jack suggested.

It took a couple of weeks before Daniel was well enough to think about returning to work at the SGC. Jack had stayed home to look after him for the first week and then, when pressure of work had forced him to return to his office, he left Daniel in the care of one of Janet's nurses.

At first Daniel had been too weak to do anything other than lie in bed with Jack helping to turn him regularly. From there he had progressed to being carried to the couch and left with the TV remote and a pile of books and journals. He itched to be back in his chair, independent and mobile again but had to admit he just didn't have the strength to either transfer into it or push himself more than a couple of yards. Day by day his strength returned until he was almost back to normal and Janet finally pronounced him fit enough to return to some light duties at the SGC.

On his last evening before returning to work Daniel cooked a special meal for Jack. By the time the General arrived home that evening the wine was chilling, the candles were flickering and a fire was burning in the hearth.

"Wow what's the occasion?" Jack asked as he came in and surveyed the scene carefully set by Daniel.

"Just a celebration of our return to health and to our relationship," Daniel suggested as he handed Jack a glass of Chardonnay.

"I'll drink to that," Jack sipped the wine and looked carefully at Daniel. He still looked a little pale, Jack thought, but otherwise he looked good enough to eat. Jack no longer saw the wheelchair and the useless legs, he saw Daniel. Someone who meant the world to him, someone he now accepted for what he was. They had struggled together but eventually had come to a new understanding of their relationship. Jack rejoiced in Daniel's abilities and accepted his disabilities. He had learned, over the months, when to help and when to step back, when to congratulate and when to commiserate.

He smiled down at Daniel, seated in his wheelchair, busily tossing a salad and he raised his glass.

"To us," he said.

Daniel paused and spun his chair round, he raised his glass.

"To us, together forever."

"You bet." The men smiled at one another across the room. Two halves now whole again.

Finis