I've Got You Babe

by Belladonna

URL: http://www.area52hkh.net/asb/belladonna/ivegotyo.php
Summary: What would happen if Jack's tongue slipped during the briefing

Daniel was watching Sam's Power point presentation, and was bored out of his gourd. How could ~anyone~ make technology this boring? And why did he have to sit through it, it wasn't his area of expertise. Ok. Now he was whining, but forcryinoutloud!

Teal'c shifted slightly in his seat, also bored mindless. He could be beating up on Marines if not for the lecture. He admired Colonel Carter greatly, she was one of his best friends, but really. There was just so much tech speak that a Jaffa could stand.

Colonel Dave Dixon wondered what deity he'd pissed off to be trapped in this goddamned meeting. He could be sleeping in his office. His 1 and a half year old was teething and he'd sat up the night with him so his wife could sleep. He felt his head nod and he jerked upright.

Colonel James Coburn could feign interest in briefing with the best of them, but he was finding it hard this time. And he had a master's in engineering! He watched the next image pop up and sighed.

Colonel Lou Ferretti's head wobbled back and thunked the chair, making him startle awake. 'Christ, she was ~still~ going at it!'

Jack sighed, his cheek resting on one hand as Sam nattered on and on. He just couldn't keep his mind on the presentation, and god, he needed caffeine desperately if this was gonna go on any longer. "Carter!" he interrupted.

"Sir?" Techno-crazed blue eyes looked at him in confusion.

"This is all well and good, but how much longer will you be? And can you condense it so that I won't fall asleep?" He said this gently, but firmly.

Sam flushed a little. She had been right, they were bored to tears. "Um, sure. Give me about 15 minutes and I'll try to break it down into bullet points for you, sir."

Jack smiled, "Then begone. We'll all meet back here in 15 minutes." He waved his hands at her and she quickly gathered up her papers and hustled out.

Daniel waited until he was reasonably sure that Sam had gone, then he turned to Jack. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

The other men around the table chuckled, "God Jack, did I snore?" Ferretti asked as he stood and stretched, wincing as his back pulled.

"Nah, I didn't hear it over Jim's heavy sighs." Jack said, grinning as Coburn rolled his eyes.

"I'm telling you Jack, if you hadn't said something I was gonna stab myself with my pen." Dave said, yawning cavernously. He covered his mouth and grumbled, "Sorry, little Jason was awake all last night with new teeth coming in."

"I understand." Jack smiled. He'd been home on one of his infrequent visits and had stayed up all night with Charlie once upon a time.

Jack's sergeant chose that moment to come in with a fresh pot of coffee, and a plate loaded with cookies, earning several heartfelt, "Bless you's." from the attendees. He arranged everything and left, knowing that there would be nothing left when he came back.

Daniel got Jack and himself some coffee, then went back to get some cookies, when Jack piped up, "Hey babe, remembered what the doc said about your sugar intake."

Conversation's abruptly dropped off as a red faced Daniel turned to stare at Jack.

Now, despite being pretty discrete, everyone knew about Jack and Daniel's relationship. And they all worshipped the ground that their General and Dr. Jackson walked on, so they'd turned a blind eye.

Coburn stifled a grin at the look of horror on the General's face. He turned to see Lou stifling a smirk as well, and Dixon trying not to laugh.

"Was not Babe the domesticated pig in the movie that we took CassandraFrasier to, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked soberly.

At this point it was too much for Lou and he started laughing, "Oh Dr. J, Jack called you a pig!" and he snorted realistically, and the men fell about laughing.

Jack was red as a beet, and his eyes shone with apology as he looked at his lover. He was reasonably sure that Daniel was gonna make him pay, and pay big. "Um, I didn't mean to insult you Daniel.I mean, you're not porky or anything." and he turned to glare at Lou , who'd had snorted again.

Dave cleared his throat, picked up his pen holding it like a microphone and began to croon, "I've got you Babe." and Lou snorted again. By this time Coburn was almost crying, he was laughing so hard, and even Daniel was reluctantly beginning to smile.

Jack threw up his hands, "Ok, damn it! Knock it off!"

Sam walked back in and was a little startled to see just about everyone laughing, and Lou Ferretti snorting. "What did I miss?" she asked in confusion.

Daniel shot a look at the three hysterical colonels, "Nothing Sam, the 'Three Stooges' are finished, right?"

The men straightened up, though Lou did add one soft snort, and then yelped as he was kicked. Everyone settled back down and eyed Sam attentively, making her a little uncomfortable.

"Oookay." Sam said, then started her shortened presentation, "This is the prototype, a Ballistic Armed Biological Eradicator, which in a kind of unwieldy name, so we call it 'Babe' for short." She stopped as the room dissolved into raucous laughter. She stared in confusion at Jack, who could only sigh.

"Ok fellas, let's schedule this for tomorrow at the same time." He watched as everyone except Daniel left, then winced as his archeologist pinned him with a severe look, "I'm sorry Danny."

"It's ok, ~Babe~." Daniel said, then had to smother his smile as Jack snorted softly.