Hooked!

by Pie

URL: http://www.area52hkh.net/asp/pie/hooked.php
Summary: Daniel is feeling trapped. What is Jack doing to help release him?

"OW!"

"Ow?"

"You've caught my damn zipper, Jack."

"Oh...ouch."

"Could you stop fucking tugging?"

"Daniel, I'm kinda on the clock here. So what if I rip your jockey's?"

"It's not my underwear that's caught. You told me to go commando, remember? One false step and I'll be singing soprano."

"Fuck."

"Only If I get these jeans off."

"I can't even get my hand down there. Are they fucking sprayed on?"

"If I recall, you love these jeans for that very reason. You said white made me look 'all ass' and wearing them was a blatant invitation I wanted to be fucked."

"Only by me. Anyone else tries it, they're dead."

"They're not gonna get fucking far are they? Will you stop fucking yanking, you're ripping all my fucking pubic hair out."

"Language, Danny-boy. We'll get them off, no problemo and then we can get ourselves off."

"You said that four hours ago."

Jack sighed silently. There was nothing more pissy than a horny, frustrated Daniel Jackson; something he'd realised more and more since they'd become lovers.

Daniel pretty much always wanted some.

They had spent seven days on the bog planet from hell with Sam and Teal'c always in earshot. The only thing that kept them going was the downtime on their return. Jack had promised to take Daniel to his cabin where they could make as much noise as they liked.

Daniel made plans to hide Jack's rod.

Jack had a plan too, which involved driving to the cabin, parking up and dragging Daniel off to have hot alfresco sex in the woods. He'd thought of everything; repellent – some bites were definitely not welcomed, comfy blanket, lubricant, a flask of coffee and sexy archaeologist to go.

Without a hitch they had settled in some sheltered spot and were in the process of ripping each other's clothes off, when Jack suddenly stilled and listened intently.

"What is it?" whispered Daniel.

"I thought I heard...." He stood up abruptly, peering over some local flora; his dick was now at a perfectly convenient height for Daniel to wrap his lips around.

"Mmmmm....."

"Fuck!"

Daniel, who had been sucking a bulging mouthful of rock hard cock with enthusiasm, now had a disconcertingly limp piece of flesh resting on his tongue.

"Um' ack?" he grumbled.

"Get dressed. Now! There's a girl scout troop heading our way."

"What?"

"Fucking get dressed."

Daniel scrambled into his clothes. "Peace and solitude is what you said." Accusation laced his voice.

"Daniel, have we really got time for this now?" Jack pointedly looked down at Daniel's crotch. "Can you put it away already?"

"It's not that easy."

"Well, think of something. Fucking resilliance of youth." Jack's tone suggested unwilling admiration and a hint of jealousy.

"You think of something."

"Fuck. I don't know. Kinsey doing the dance of the seven veils."

"Ewwww! Keep going."

"Maybourne clipping his toenails."

Oh yuck. More, give me more."

"Nerdy Narim and Carter going at it like bunnies with that mangy cat watching."

"Yes, that's it!"

Jack grabbed hold of Daniel and clumsily stuffed everything back in and zipped up his jeans.

"Thanks, Jack," he sighed in gratitude, as the shouting girls sounded closer.

"Why is there a troop of scouts on your land?"

"Welllllll...ummm...I forgot. This must be the weekend of their annual woodland camp-out, I sorta give them permission."

"Fucking great!"

"I didn't forget on pur......"

"Colonel O' Neill! Oh! Thank goodness." The troop leader was obviously worried.

"It's General O'Neill now, Ma'am." He smiled at her in a reassuringly charming manner. "How can I help?"

"Three of my girls are missing...."

00.10

"It was hardly my fault that old troopy drawers lost her girls."

"Funny, she didn't seem too worried about their plight when she kept dragging you off into the undergrowth to look for them. She was feeling no pain."

"I was helping her."

"She knew those woods like the back of her hand, we were going round in circles. Four Hours! Remind me again - where did we find them?"

Jack was sheepish. "Ummm...."

"Yes, fucking back at their camp, having a great time making S'mores."

Jack decided to change the subject. "Let's get you out of those jeans. We can try soap."

00.30

"Okay, this does not seem to be working."

"Ya think," snarled Daniel.

"On the upside, you do have a really clean zipper and a crotch that's scented like lillies."

"Jack, I don't care if I smell like a Jarhead's jockstrap. I need to get out of these jeans, before my circulation is cut off."

"Cut off! That's it."

"No."

"But..."

"Forget it."

"Daniel, I'm gonna explode."

"They cost eight hundred dollars. I'm not cutting them off."

"They're not exactly pristine now."

"I don't care. No."

01.00

"Hey! I've got an idea."

Daniel woke from his light slumber. "You have?"

"Yeahsureyabetcha. You hold on to the bedstead and I'll tug at your jeans."

"Hmmmm..." Daniel tried hard not to sound dubious.

"C'mon, what have we got to lose? Nothing except two painfully hard dicks."

Daniel arranged himself on the bed.

"Right, you get a firm grip and I'll pull like crazy."

"That's what you said the first time you suckered me into bed."

"Very funny. Now hold tight."

02.00

"Oh."

"Urghhhhhhhhhh."

"Oh god, Jack."

"Jeeeeeeezus."

"Owowowowowowowowow."

"Stop! You're breaking my arms."

"Forget sprayed on, they are fucking glued on." Jack slumped tiredly down on the bed beside his pissy lover.

"I now have first hand knowledge what the Rack felt like."

"Well, you've always said you'd like to be taller." Jack was irrepressible. "You might be six feet something now."

"Fuck off, Jack!" Daniel turned away from his lover, who immediately followed and began trailing a coaxing hand up Daniel's arm.

"Daniel?"

"What?"

"I don't want to come off as a selfish bastard, but you could do me."

"Excuse me?"

"There's no reason for us both to go without. You could suck me off. It might make you feel better."

"Let me get this straight. You want me to give you a blowjob, even though I can't get any in return and if I get in the least turned on, there's a good chance my dick will turn blue and drop off."

"Is that a no?"

"No, it's not a no. It's a fuck off and die. Horribly."

"Just checking."

03.15

"Daniel?"

"Fuck off!"

"Okay."

04.05

"What about a hand job?"

"No thanks."

"For me."

"What I said."

"You're such a hard hearted bastard. I'm dying of frustration here."

"Jack, you have two hands."

"So?"

"Pick one."

"What? Jerk myself off? I've not had to do that for months."

"You'd better get some practice in. Cos if you disturb me once more, you're gonna become intimately reacquainted with your right hand."

"............"

"Jack?"

"This is me, shutting up."

"Good."

04.45

"What the fuck are you doing now?"

"I'm lubing it up."

"What on earth for?"

"Well, apparently it will make it slide down much more easily. I hooked up the laptop and checked it out."

"Is it working?"

"Not really."

"Shocker."

05.40 Sunrise

"Hey! Wat'cha doing out here?"

"I woke up. I really need to get these jeans off now."

"Yes! Now you're talking, Danny-boy. Let me go find something to cut them off with."

"Hurry, Jack. I can't wait."

"I'm on it. Woke up with morning wood, did ya? What can I say? Who wouldn't, waking up with yours truly?"

"Hurry the fuck up."

Jack rushed into the cabin and returned with some scissors.

"Hold on and I'll try not to cut something I shouldn't."

"Funny, Jack."

"Fuck, this is hard. I'm not gonna cut here. I might do some damage to one of the things that makes my life worth living."

"Prick."

"Yes!"

"No, you are a prick. Can't you go any quicker?"

"Okay, let's try the ass end."

Daniel turned around and presented his rear to the General.

"Umm Daniel. I just can't. What if I cut you? The scar will remind me and I'll never get it up again."

"Jack! If you don't get these jeans off me in the next sixty seconds, you will never have to worry about getting it up...ever. I will be cutting something off myself. Do I make myself clear?"

Jack gulped and got to work. Soon, white denim was pooled around Daniel's feet.

"Yes!" cried Jack in triumph. "At last."

He moved to take his wilful lover into his arms.

"Get off me, Jack," snarled Daniel.

"Whaaa?"

"I've gotta fucking go."

"Go?"

"Yes, GO."

"You mean you wouldn't entertain cutting them off to have hot sex with me, but to go the freakin' toilet you will? Thanks for nothing." Jack was talking to himself. Daniel in the bathroom moaning with pleasured relief. Jack could not convince even himself that Daniel sounded that ecstatic when in bed with him.

Jack looked sourly at the newly risen sun. "No sense in wasting this fine morning. I'm gonna do some fishing."

Suddenly a warm, naked body was pressed to his back and an exploring hand delved beneath the waistband of his jeans.

"Hmmmm! I seem to have caught something. It feels like a big 'un," came a sensuous, sultry whisper. A capable hand began firmly massaging Jack's hard length.

"Silly me, it's not a fish - I've found your rod and it's very impressive."

"Mmmm."

"I don't know much about fishing, but I think I can find something to bait your hook."

"Urgggghhhhh."

Daniel knelt down between Jack's splayed legs.

"And extend your pole."

"Daniel!"

"I just need to reel you in first."

Finis

Author's Note: Thanks for reading:-)