Possession 3

Strength

by Sistine

URL: http://www.area52hkh.net/ass/sistine/possession03.php
Summary: Can Daniel get past his recent experiences so that he can start a new life with Jack?

Daniel stared into the bathroom mirror, reliving the previous day's events. Firstly there had been the mission, where Makepeace had threatened him again. Then Jack had suddenly come home, confirming Daniel's theory about the mission to catch the thieves. Makepeace was subsequently arrested, which was a great relief to Daniel. And then Jack had arrived at his apartment with a surprisingly eloquent apology and a gentleness that had resulted in them sharing a bed, the aforementioned linguist sleeping contentedly in Jack's arms. So why didn't he feel over the moon this morning?

The fading mark near his collarbone hinted at the answer. The fear he had experienced over the past ten days wasn't just going to go away overnight. He could still feel Makepeace's unwanted touch on his skin, the teeth digging into his neck. Closing his eyes against the memories, he leaned forward, resting his hands on the edge of the sink. Makepeace was gone now; he wouldn't be able to hurt him anymore.

Daniel jumped with fright when two hands slid around his waist. Heart thumping, he opened his eyes to see Jack's reflection staring at him with concern. Jack. Not Makepeace. Jack wasn't going to hurt him.

"What's up?" Jack felt the tension in his partner's body and was curious as to the cause. When he'd left Daniel in bed that morning so that he could start breakfast, the linguist had been absolutely boneless. What had happened in the last fifteen minutes to change that?

"Nothing, I'm fine." His heart-rate was returning to normal but he couldn't relax. It had just been too similar to the other incident. Daniel rested his arms over Jack's, wanting to lean into the embrace but resisting the temptation. "Really."

"Dan-iel," Jack warned. "You jumped when I touched you." And he was trying not to take that personally.

"You surprised me, that's all." That was a credible reason. He started to move away, not wanting the conversation to continue, but Jack didn't let go. "Jack." Now was not the time to push this.

Jack rested his chin on Daniel's shoulder and stared into the reflected blue eyes. "You can tell me, Daniel."

"There's nothing to tell," the linguist persisted and broke away. He couldn't tell Jack exactly what had happened, not yet.

The older man just watched Daniel leave the bathroom. Something had been wrong, of that Jack was certain. The 'I'm fine' was a definite clue. Was Daniel having second thoughts about their relationship? But that didn't explain the fear in Daniel's eyes when Jack had surprised him. Maybe Daniel was just a little gun-shy of intimacy at the moment, and Jack couldn't blame him if Makepeace had attempted to rape the civilian. If only Jack knew what exactly had happened, then he could help... actually, maybe not the details, but definitely a general idea. But getting Daniel to talk would be like finding a Tok'ra who didn't have a hidden agenda - near impossible.

Jack knew how hard rape was to get over. Actually, perhaps 'get over' wasn't the right phrase... maybe 'get past' would be better. It had taken him six months before he could talk about it with the airforce shrink, and he'd never been able to tell Sara just what was done to him in Iraq. But that was all part of the past and he'd dealt with the feelings it had caused. Now he had to help Daniel do the same thing. He wouldn't push Daniel to talk but he needed to be there for him when the linguist was ready.

He found Daniel in the kitchen drinking a large cup of coffee. Walking over to the young man, he briefly kissed the coffee-flavoured lips. "Good morning, Daniel."

A tentative smile appeared on the linguist's face. "Good morning, Jack." He liked having Jack there for breakfast; it was an intimate yet comforting thing to share.

Jack continued on his way and collected the toast before returning to Daniel. "Any regrets?"

Fears, yes, regrets, no. He shook his head, keeping eye contact with Jack. "You?"

"I'm assuming that's a rhetorical question," Jack replied, grinning at Daniel before going over to the table and sitting down. He then looked back over at Daniel, who hadn't moved, and gestured towards the food-laden table. "Come over here and eat something."

Daniel went and sat down at right angles to Jack, then retrieved a piece of toast. As he slowly ate it, he watched Jack, whose appetite seemed to be as healthy as ever. His eyes examined the scar through the left eyebrow; the lines around the eyes; the silver hair; the soft brown eyes... all defining characteristics that helped make Jack attractive. Then there were the strong hands that had held him last night; the lean, well-built body; and those long legs that completed the package. Jack was definitely an attractive man and Daniel didn't know why he hadn't realised this before. Add to that a compassionate and loving soul, and it was no wonder that he had fallen in love with Jack. But he still couldn't understand why Jack loved him.

"Now I know how an artifact feels," Jack commented mildly after feeling Daniel's eyes catalogue him. He grinned as his love blushed at being caught staring.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, uh..."

"It's okay, Daniel. It's not like I haven't done that myself." He caught the archaeologist's surprised look and correctly interpreted the question but didn't answer it. "Like what you see?"

He most definitely did. "Yes." Daniel decided, though, that Jack really didn't need his ego stroked too much.

"The feeling's very mutual," Jack assured him.

"Ja-ack." He was flattered but disbelieving, although there had to be something about him that attracted the predators... and Jack.

"Sorry," Jack said, sounding anything but. He finished the mouthful of breakfast and then took his plates over to the sink. "Do you want a lift into the Mountain?"

Daniel flashed him another surprised look. "You have to go in today?"

"Hammond wants to go over the 'mission'," he laced the last word with disgust. Jack went back, pulled Daniel to his feet, and then loosely held the linguist to him. "I thought you might like to come with me."

Shaking his head, Daniel replied, "You need to go home first and get changed. I'll meet you at the base in an hour." He needed some space to think.

"Okay." Jack lightly kissed Daniel, making it long enough for the younger man to start responding rather than freaking, and then pulled back. "Bye."

"Bye," Daniel automatically replied, missing the safety of Jack's arms immediately. He might have wanted some space but at least when Jack was there, he helped keep the memories at bay.

He sat down again, staring at his breakfast and thinking. He loved Jack, he wanted Jack, but it appeared that he had a slight problem with Jack touching him. No, not Jack, just being touched in general. No prizes for guessing why. He had to get over it. If he didn't, Jack would push him to talk about it, and then Jack would be disgusted that Makepeace had put his hands on Daniel, and then Jack wouldn't love him anymore...

Okay, now he was just getting melodramatic. Jack had come back to him and most importantly, he loved Daniel. So he would understand, wouldn't he?

'He's not going to take you back' - Makepeace's cruel taunt still haunted him. Although the colonel had the wrong idea about his and Jack's relationship, Daniel had wondered after the first assault as to its truth. If Makepeace had succeeded - Daniel shuddered at the thought - would Jack have wanted used goods? It was something he hoped he'd never have to find out.

Draining the last of his coffee, he stood up and headed off to get ready for work. It was no good dwelling on the whole thing. He hadn't been raped, Makepeace couldn't hurt him anymore... everything was going to be just fine.

~~~~

"Colonel, there's something else I need to discuss with you."

Jack looked at Hammond in frustration. After arriving at the Mountain earlier, he'd barely had time to say 'hi' to Danny before he had been whisked off to the debriefing. He had noticed that his archaeologist had been looking less tense though, which was good. Biting down his annoyance - he wanted to see Daniel now - he replied, "Sir?" while drumming his fingertips on the edge of the desk.

"An allegation has been made that concerns you, Jack." Hammond hated this but he had to investigate. "You and Doctor Jackson."

"And what kind of allegation might that be, sir?" Jack had a bad feeling about this.

The general looked quite uncomfortable. "That you and the doctor are... intimately involved."

"Excuse me?" If only it were true... "Can I ask who made the allegation?" He had made quite a number of enemies with the undercover mission.

"Colonel Makepeace," Hammond supplied, and was surprised to see the level of hatred that flared in Jack's eyes.

"Son of a -" Jack bit off what he was going to say and tried to calm down. "Sir, he's obviously trying to take me down with him in revenge for arresting him. And he and Daniel never got along all that well." Which was something of an understatement.

Hammond nodded. "I thought that might be the case. But I have to investigate it anyway." Something that wasn't going to bring him any pleasure.

"I understand." Jack sighed. Thanks, Makepeace, he thought sarcastically. "What do you want me to do?"

"Well, before the official investigation starts, is there anything that I should know about that might be taken the wrong way by others?" He knew how close the two men were and had some concerns over how outsiders might view their relationship.

Jack shook his head. "Nothing out of the ordinary, sir."

"Where did you go after leaving the base yesterday, colonel?"

"Daniel's," Jack admitted reluctantly. "I wanted to apologise for the awful things I said to him." Which was true. "We ended up talking for hours so I stayed the night on the couch." He rubbed the back of his neck for emphasis.

"And Doctor Jackson will confirm this?"

"Yes." Hopefully. Daniel was perceptive enough to know how to spin the truth in this case. "Will the NID run this?"

Hammond nodded. "Their man will arrive in less than an hour." A knock on the door interrupted him. "Enter."

Daniel opened the door and was surprised to see Jack still there. "You wanted to see me, general?" He had got the message a while ago but had waited until he thought the debriefing would be over.

"Yes, Doctor Jackson, sit down." He saw the inquiring look the doctor sent at the colonel and the grimace he received in return. "I've just been telling Colonel O'Neill that the NID will be arriving soon to investigate an allegation that Colonel Makepeace made last night."

The blood drained from Daniel's face. "What - what did he say?" He remembered the threats that Makepeace had made, although the colonel had said he wasn't going to tell the general anything.

"That you and the colonel are involved in an illegal relationship." Hammond shared a concerned look with Jack. What was Daniel so worried about? "Is this true?"

"No, sir." Daniel managed to look the general in the eye but he was still pale from the shock. So this was how Makepeace was going to get back at him.

Hammond heard the conviction in his voice. "Good. The investigation should be quick then." He hated to think that Makepeace was that vindictive though. "Until that time, I'm afraid I'll have to ask the two of you to stay away from each other."

Jack nodded. He understood the reasons.

Daniel also nodded. He needed some time to take in the turn of events.

"Dismissed then."

Jack waited until they were outside the office before saying to Daniel, "You have to tell Hammond about..."

"No!" Daniel said emphatically. He was not going to tell anyone; he did not want to cope with the sympathy that he'd receive from his friends nor the awkward silences. "And neither will you."

"Daniel-"

"Jack, no. Don't tell me that it'll be better if I told someone. I have told someone. You. And that's bad enough." He started to walk away but Jack followed.

"And if you have no choice?" It sounded like Daniel's stubbornness had kicked in. "Wouldn't it be better to tell Hammond than the NID?"

Daniel turned to look at Jack determinedly. "Probably. But there's no guarantee that the subject will come up, is there?" His gaze challenged Jack's. When the other man didn't answer, Daniel turned and walked away, arms crossed and head down.

Jack sighed in frustration and then headed off in the other direction. It seemed Daniel was firmly in denial at the moment. That was not going to help his recovery any. And he had the awful feeling that Daniel wasn't going to be allowed to keep his secret.

~~~~

Daniel paced up and down outside the room where Jack was currently being questioned. It was all his fault. If he had let Makepeace do what he wanted, then this wouldn't be happening now. It was all his fault that Jack was being investigated for something that would get him jailed but that he had never done. That was the ironic part of the whole thing. And Makepeace was probably sitting there in jail getting a kick out of the trouble he was causing. What better way to get back at both him and Jack? And if Jack wasn't jailed, then there would still be the rumours, worse than before. It was all his fault.

When the door finally opened and Jack appeared, Daniel was relieved to see the sparkle - almost hidden by the frustration - in Jack's eyes. That meant things had gone well. He only hoped he didn't stuff things up now that it was his turn.

Jack was worried about Daniel. The linguist was in self-hugging mode, which usually meant that he was upset, hurt, feeling guilty, or all three. Daniel would somehow find a way to blame himself for this, and their fledgling relationship would undergo yet another test while Jack tried to convince him otherwise. Makepeace had certainly chosen the best way to hurt the two of them.

Inside the room, Daniel took a seat opposite the man from NID. General Hammond was sitting nearby as an observer.

"Doctor Jackson, I'd like to ask you a few questions about your relationship with Colonel O'Neill," Major Martin stated.

Daniel nodded his consent.

"Have you ever had sex with Colonel O'Neill?"

"No." Or with anyone else in recent memory, he thought dryly; his love-life had been practically non-existent.

"I must remind you to tell the truth, Doctor Jackson."

"I am," Daniel said forcefully. How dare the major accuse him of lying!

Martin smirked. "Forgive me, Doctor Jackson, but I have a statement here from Colonel Makepeace that you admitted to sleeping with Colonel O'Neill and, quote, 'goodness knows how many others.' Do you deny that you said this?"

Daniel fought to keep his face expressionless. He should have known not to say anything like that.

"Doctor Jackson?"

The linguist looked at Hammond, who was watching him with concern, then back at the NID man. "Yes, I said that."

"So you have slept with Colonel O'Neill?" Martin persisted.

"No. I just said that to get Makepeace off my back." Daniel now wished he hadn't.

"Why say it if it wasn't true?" Martin sensed there was something that the doctor was hiding.

"Because Colonel Makepeace believed it was true, and I was trying to make a point."

"What point was that?"

Daniel swallowed hard. He was going to have to say it. "Why I wasn't going to sleep with him."

"Colonel Makepeace?" Hammond blurted out. So that was why Daniel had gone pale at the mention of the colonel's name that morning.

Daniel nodded, wrapping his arms across his chest. Jack had been right - he should have told Hammond earlier instead of having the NID know about it.

"You told Colonel Makepeace that you sleep with other men so that he wouldn't sleep with you?" Martin queried.

Put that way, it sounded stupid. "I was trying to explain the difference between free choice and being forced into having sex. Makepeace believed the rumours so I was just using that against him," Daniel tried to explain. "He didn't listen."

Hammond turned angry eyes on Martin. "It sounds to me like you're investigating the wrong man."

Martin wasn't so sure. "We only have Doctor Jackson's word for this." He turned to the civilian. "Are you claiming that Colonel Makepeace sexually harassed you while you were under his command?"

"Yes." The word was spoken softly but firmly.

"Assault?"

Daniel looked down at the table. "Yes."

"I see." This could be a problem, Martin thought. "The question still remains though as to your involvement with Colonel O'Neill."

Incredulous eyes looked up at the major. "Excuse me?"

"Excuse me?" Hammond's words nearly overlapped Daniel's.

"Colonel Makepeace is not the one under suspicion."

"Well, it sounds like he should be," Hammond stated. He believed the doctor even if Martin didn't. And he knew that Daniel wouldn't have wanted to bother anyone about it as no-one was getting hurt but him. "There is certainly no evidence to suggest that Colonel O'Neill and Doctor Jackson are involved, just the word of an officer who is apparently trying to deflect attention from his own actions. But I suspect that Doctor Jackson has the evidence to prove his accusations."

The bruises on his upper thighs where they had been pressed against the sink in the locker room, which were beginning to turn a nice green colour. Fortunately, Jack hadn't seen them yet.

Martin looked from the general to the doctor in annoyance. It appeared that he wouldn't be able to continue his investigation unless more evidence was found; Maybourne would not be pleased. He started to pack up his papers. "Very well. If Doctor Jackson could write a detailed report on the assaults, then we will see if there is any need to investigate further."

"You're not going to question me now?" Daniel was a little confused but not surprised. The NID would want to protect their own man.

"There shouldn't be any need." Martin would make sure of it. "A report will be fine. If you'll excuse me, general?"

"By all means." Hammond was pleased to see the back of the man.

Jack rushed into the room. "How'd it go?" He then saw his partner's body language. Something was wrong. "Danny?"

"The investigation's been dropped," Daniel stated tonelessly.

"Isn't that good news?" Jack looked at Hammond, who was also looking grim. He had the feeling that Daniel had been forced to tell about the assaults.

Hammond shook his head. "Doctor Jackson, I want to see that report before it goes off to the NID. And I want you to speak with Doctor McKenzie."

"No." Daniel was adamant. He was not going to see a psychiatrist, especially if it was McKenzie. "I don't need to talk to McKenzie. I'm fine."

"It's not a request, doctor, it's an order." Hammond remembered how Daniel had been after Hathor's rape, and this time he was going to insist that the civilian talk with someone.

Daniel looked up at Jack, begging him to help somehow.

"Would it count if Daniel talked to me?" Jack asked, unable to refuse the look in those clear blue eyes.

Hammond considered that for a few moments; he shouldn't be surprised that Jack knew. The general knew from Jack's file that he had gone through a similar thing so he would understand what Daniel was going through. He nodded, giving him permission. "Take the rest of the day off."

"Thank-you, sir." When Hammond had left the room, Jack turned to Daniel and asked, "My house?"

"I don't want to talk, Jack." There was nothing he wanted to talk about.

"So we won't talk." Jack had a plan in mind that he wanted to try out. "We'll just hang out, okay?"

Daniel didn't believe him for a second but agreed anyway. Maybe he would be able to distract Jack somehow.

~~~~

"Want anything to drink?" Jack offered as he walked into his house, followed closely by Daniel.

"No, I'm fine," Daniel replied, watching Jack retrieve a beer from the fridge. He then watched with interest as Jack pulled some sort of device from his pocket.

Jack put a finger to his lips, then tugged on his ear to indicate that the house might again be bugged. Daniel remained silent as Jack went quietly through the house, checking to see if the NID had planted more bugs in order to gain evidence against them.

A couple of minutes later, Jack came back smiling. "It's clean. So, do you want to watch some hockey?" He picked up his beer again and headed through to the loungeroom.

"We're not going to talk?" Daniel was a little confused by Jack's actions. Normally the older man would pester him for hours if he thought something was wrong.

"I only said that to Hammond so you wouldn't have to see McKenzie." Jack patted the cushion next to him. "Come on, sit down and relax."

Still slightly suspicious, Daniel did so. Immediately, Jack put an arm around the linguist's shoulders and drew him close. Daniel tensed up, hating himself for doing so. It was a gesture of support, not an pass. Consciously, he relaxed and then rested his head on Jack's shoulder. This was nice.

Jack let out the mental breath he had been holding when he felt Daniel relax. Daniel was far from all right. Makepeace might not have committed an actual rape but his actions had certainly created some mental scars.

He finished off the beer slowly, giving Daniel time to completely relax. The linguist probably wasn't going to thank him for what he was about to do. Jack needed to make Daniel face what had happened and the way to do that was to prove that he had a problem; otherwise the younger man wouldn't get past it for a long time.

Slowly, Jack ran his hand down Daniel's arm and then shifted it to settle onto the linguist's hip, all the time keeping his eyes on the television. He felt Daniel's muscles tense up again, his head shifting slightly to look up at Jack suspiciously. Jack kept his face blank as if he was doing the whole thing absently.

Daniel moved his head back onto Jack's shoulder, telling himself that it was okay, it was only Jack wanting to hold him close. He closed his eyes, concentrating on what Jack felt like - his shoulder hard beneath Daniel's cheek; the warm arm across his back; the fingers curled over his hip, the thumb stroking gently. He could also smell Jack's aftershave when he was up this close. Daniel became aware of a hint of desire deep within him, the knowledge that he was so close to Jack beginning to excite him. Tucking his legs up beside him, Daniel relaxed again into Jack's touch.

The older man waited for a few more minutes before sliding his fingers around to Daniel's stomach. He heard the sharp intake of breath as the linguist sucked his stomach in. Jack figured from the reaction that he had found a definite hotspot so he kept his hand still, letting Daniel get used to it.

As Jack's hand moved onto his stomach, Daniel remembered Makepeace's unwanted hand doing the same thing. He opened his eyes, trying to ground his mind in reality rather than in the past. He couldn't understand why he knew it was Jack and yet he was still reacting as though it was Makepeace. He wanted to enjoy being with Jack so he forced himself to relax - again - and he entwined his fingers with Jack's, both hands resting on his stomach. He knew what Jack was trying to do, or at least he assumed he did, but there was only so much he could cope with at a time.

It had taken Daniel longer to relax that time but Jack was glad that he eventually had. He smiled when he felt the long fingers entwine with his, Daniel-speak for 'I love you but don't go any further'. Jack shifted his head slightly so that he could plant a kiss in Daniel's hair. Maybe he should stop the touching and not push Danny any more for a while. Besides, snuggling on the couch was nice; he had often enjoyed spending quiet time with Sara like this, happy to just be with each other.

"They're going to be watching us now, aren't they?" Daniel said out of the blue.

"Who?"

"The NID."

"Probably for a while," Jack agreed. "Maybourne's not going to be too happy with me after shutting down his little operation."

Daniel sat up and looked directly at Jack. "Then maybe we shouldn't be doing this. I mean, if they found out..."

"Then I would very quickly retire. But they're not going to find out. Ah!" Jack held up one finger to stop Daniel from interrupting. "If we stop hanging out together then they'll know something is up. If we keep acting like ourselves though, then they'll be less suspicious."

Daniel was still doubtful. He looked down at his hand, which had somehow ended up on Jack's thigh, and noticed that Jack was slightly aroused. Swallowing his nervousness, he looked away. He really didn't want to think about sex right now. "What about Makepeace?"

"What about him?" Jack's grin at Daniel's apparent shyness faded at the question.

"What if he keeps saying... things... about us?" He felt Jack's finger under his chin as the older man gently forced him to look upwards.

"He hasn't got a case because nothing has happened." Yet. "So there's nothing to worry about."

Yes, there was, Daniel thought as he snuggled back up to Jack and put one arm across his partner's chest. "He told me if I said anything, he'd arrange for me to become a punching bag for his mates." Well, that was the implied threat anyway. "I think the report constitutes saying something."

Jack didn't remember that threat - the only one he'd heard was about Daniel risking his career... okay, maybe it could be construed that way. "I'll take care of it." Teal'c should be able to scare any potential attackers off. "Now stop worrying, that's an order."

"Since when do I follow orders, Jack?" Daniel asked with a slight chuckle.

"There's always a first time." Jack ruffled the short, soft hair and then put his hand back on Daniel's stomach. This time Daniel didn't tense up, which was a step in the right direction.

They stayed like that for quite a while, enjoying the quiet time. Jack was pleasantly aroused but not urgently so; just having Daniel this close to him was producing that effect. Daniel appeared to be very relaxed, snuggled in close, so Jack decided to continue with his plan.

With slow movements, he gently undid a shirt button and then slid his hand onto bare skin. When Daniel didn't jump, Jack started to explore.

Daniel had just been sitting there, his thoughts drifting, when he felt Jack's hand move. The shift onto bare skin didn't worry him but when the fingers moved lower, he reacted automatically by moving away from Jack.

Oh, yeah, another hotspot there, Jack thought, furious at Makepeace for laying his hands so intimately on Danny. The linguist had said that the officer hadn't got very far but Jack now suspected that things had actually gone quite far - almost too far, in fact. This was worse than he had thought. "Danny?"

"I'm sorry, Jack, I, uh..." Daniel didn't know what to say. He wanted Jack to touch him but he couldn't let him, and if he kept this up, then Jack would give up on him and he didn't think he could bear that.

"Daniel, what did Makepeace do?" Jack asked softly.

The younger man closed his eyes and shook his head. He didn't want to talk about it.

"Daniel..."

The linguist opened his eyes and stood up, going to walk away, but Jack caught his wrist. "I want to help you, Danny, but I can't unless you tell me." When Daniel just remained silent, Jack continued, "How far did he get? And tell the truth this time."

Daniel tugged at the grip holding him but knew Jack wasn't going to let him go. Closing his eyes again so that he wouldn't have to see Jack when he said this, he replied in a very soft voice, "Nearly all the way."

Jack immediately stood up and wrapped Daniel in his arms, comforting him. He felt so guilty that he hadn't been there to protect Daniel from Makepeace, and then there was the fact that the situation wouldn't have arisen if he hadn't gone undercover to help Earth's so-called allies. It appeared the cost of his help was very high. "We'll get thought this, Danny," he promised. "You have to let me help you though."

Daniel nodded against Jack's shoulder. He didn't want to keep feeling so scared of intimacy. "It's hard."

"I know." Jack stroked Daniel's neck. "Been there, done that. But you can do it."

'Been there, done that'? Daniel lifted his head curiously. "Jack?" the question evident.

"You tell me, I'll tell you," the older man said with a hint of humour. "But right now, I think we both need some coffee. Starbucks?"

"I'll get my jacket."

~~~~

Eight o'clock that evening found them back at Jack's place finishing the last of their Chinese take-away. They'd had a fun afternoon, Jack doing his best to take Daniel's mind off things. After Starbucks, they had taken in a movie, holding each other's hand in the darkness. Then they had spent a while arguing about what take-away to get before Daniel resorted to fluttering his eyelashes until Jack gave in.

And now Jack was trying to coax Daniel into sitting with him on the couch.

"No, Jack," Daniel said firmly despite the grin on his face. He hadn't felt this happy in nearly four months and he didn't want to spoil it. If he went over to sit next to Jack, there would be touching and although he had made a little progress that afternoon, he didn't feel up to more of that at the moment.

"You sure? I mean, it's a perfectly good cushion." Jack patted it for emphasis.

"I really should go home. I need to write the report for the general." Much as he didn't want to because he knew that Makepeace would never be charged.

"So write it here," Jack offered. He had a perfectly good computer that had hardly ever been used.

Daniel shook his head. "I need to do this by myself."

"No, you don't," Jack disagreed. "We're partners now. We don't have to do things by ourselves anymore." At least, that was the way he saw it.

That caused Daniel to stop and think. He wasn't alone now; he had Jack. But there were still things that he needed to do by himself and this was one of them. "If they're watching our houses, they'll know if I don't go home. And I don't want to be the cause of your incarceration."

Jack sighed as he gave in. He wasn't going to win this argument. And besides, Daniel had a point. "We'll continue this discussion tomorrow night, okay?"

Daniel nodded. "Thank-you." Then he grinned as he realised what Jack had said. "You're going to discuss?"

"Hey, I discuss!" Jack protested half-heartedly. He was a typical male - generally, discussions about emotional things were something to avoid but for Daniel, he'd make an exception.

"Sure you do, Jack." Daniel put just the right amount of scepticism into his voice. He generally didn't 'discuss' either, preferring to keep his feelings to himself, but occasionally it felt good to talk things over with someone. There were a few secrets that he and Jack had shared in the past but nothing on this scale. He stood up and retrieved his jacket.

Jack retaliated by throwing a cushion at his best friend. "Just for that, we're going to your place tomorrow and you're going to provide the beer and hockey for the post-discussion wallowing."

"Jack, I don't like beer and I don't get the sports channels," Daniel pointed out, walking over to Jack as the older man got up.

"And your point is?" Jack didn't see the problem - if there was nothing to watch, they would have to find something else to do.

"I'm just saying..." The linguist borrowed one of Jack's phrases. He stood in front of the other man, wondering what to do next. He'd never been in a relationship with a man before and didn't know what was expected of him. "So, do we, uh, kiss now or... what?"

"We do whatever's comfortable," Jack replied. "There's no absolute rules in a gay relationship, or at least, none that I've come across."

"You've done this before?" Jack had kept that piece of information very quiet.

"Uh, no." Not that he hadn't had the odd twinges of attraction towards men but he had never acted on those impulses. Until now. "But I've researched - yes, I can research when I put my mind to it - and I think that so long as we're ourselves, we'll be fine."

Jack researched for him? The mind boggled as to what and how Jack actually researched. "So you would...?"

"Kiss you." What could he say? He couldn't keep his hands off Daniel before he realised that he was in love. "And you...?"

"Would usually get kissed by the other person," Daniel replied, thinking back on his relationships. He hadn't realised it at the time but he tended to pick women who were more comfortable with open affection than he was. Did he want to continue that trend with Jack?

"Ah."

Realising that Jack had initiated all their kisses so far, Daniel decided that it wasn't fair on Jack if he had to make all the moves, so he leaned in and brushed his lips over the other man's. He then looked into Jack's eyes and saw the approval there; whether it was because Daniel had made the move or the fact he had done it without tensing up, the young man wasn't sure. "Bye then."

"Bye." Jack watched Daniel leave, the linguist shooting a shy smile over his shoulder as he reached the door.

When Daniel had gone, Jack collapsed on the couch again. He could tell that being a relationship with Daniel was going to be a fulfilling but occasionally trying experience.

~~~~

By the time Daniel arrived at the mountain the next morning, he had already had three cups of coffee to help keep him awake. He had spent half the night writing the 'report' and the other half thinking about it and his new relationship with Jack. By his estimates, he'd had about two hours sleep so he had needed plenty of coffee to wake him up.

After delivering the report to Hammond, Daniel was instructed to go down to the infirmary so that Janet could get any injuries on record. By the time he got there, Janet was expecting him, waiting with a concerned expression on her face.

"Daniel," she said softly, leading him to a private area. "Is there anything you want to tell me before we start?"

He didn't even want to be there so no way did he want to talk. But if he didn't say something, the examination would be extremely thorough. "There's only a few bruises, Janet, honestly."

"Uh-huh," was all Janet said, not entirely believing him. "Let's see."

Daniel walked out of the infirmary ten minutes later, completely embarrassed. Janet's exam had only turned up a few bruises - as Daniel had predicted - but she had examined everything.

"Hey," Jack said, coming up behind the linguist. He had just been in to see Hammond, who had mentioned where Daniel was. "You alright?"

"I'm fine," Daniel replied automatically.

Jack recognised the 'I don't want to talk' signals and wisely decided not to press the issue. "So did you see anyone suspicious hanging around last night?"

Daniel stopped and looked at Jack. "Now that you mention it, yes. Last night and this morning. A black van."

"Me too. Pretty cliched, huh?" It was almost as if the NID wanted to be seen. Jack couldn't think of what the motivation for that would be though, except maybe to let them know that they were being watched. But why?

"Do you think they're still investigating us?" Daniel started walking again, heading to the elevator.

"Oh, yeah." Jack followed him into the elevator. "It's the only way they can get rid of me short of actually killing me."

Daniel went pale at the thought. Would Maybourne do that? "That's not funny, Jack."

"Sorry." He hadn't thought before speaking. "Look, we'll just take it easy for a little while and the interest will blow over." The lift doors opened and he got out, closely followed by Daniel. "Do you want to cancel tonight?"

"I don't know." Daniel didn't say anything else until they were nearly at his office. He stopped and drew a piece of paper out of his pocket. "Maybe you should read this first."

Jack accepted the sheet curiously. He unfolded it and looked at the first line. It was a copy of Daniel's report. Swallowing hard, he refolded the sheet and held it out to the linguist. "I don't need to read this."

"Yes, you do." Daniel crossed his arms. "It's easier for me to tell you this way. Please?"

Jack nodded and put the paper in his pocket. "Okay. I'll see you later?"

"You can buy me lunch," Daniel said, managing to smile, and then he went into his office. He had actually written two things the previous night - the report for the general and the NID, which didn't go into great detail but covered the main events; and one for Jack which went into more detail. He had thought long and hard about whether or not to write one for Jack - as he'd said, it was easier than talking about it. And he wasn't sure he wanted to hear Jack's immediate reaction, especially if it was disgust at him. Therefore Daniel had written it up. Both reports were very matter-of-fact though, almost as if he were talking about someone else. But he wasn't, and he didn't know how Jack was going to react. He would find out at lunchtime.

~~~~

Jack went straight back to his office, locked the door, and sat down at his desk, the folded sheet in his hand. He wasn't sure he wanted to read what had happened, especially since Makepeace wasn't around to beat into a pulp but Daniel wanted him to read it, so he would.

Hands shaking, he unfolded the sheet and read through its contents. Several times he had to stop and compose himself, and by the end of it, he was feeling sick and very angry. Makepeace had abused Daniel - had very nearly raped him. Only providence and some self-defence skills had saved it from being much worse. He was proud of Daniel for fighting back and for protecting himself. Jack just wished that he hadn't had to.

Sitting back in his chair, he crumpled the sheet into a ball and threw it across the room. He didn't need the paper any more - the words were burnt into his brain. From the description, he was easily able to figure out why Daniel was touchy about touching, and now he wondered whether his method of help was actually going to be any help. But somehow Jack thought that just talking it over with Daniel wouldn't do the trick. The discussion needed to be accompanied by some action as well.

Decision made, Jack got up and headed out of his office. He needed to go to the gym to work off some of his anger.

~~~~

"Daniel."

"DanielJackson."

The archaeologist in question looked up from his work to see Sam and Teal'c enter the office. "Oh, hi, guys." He looked at the clock; nope, it wasn't lunchtime. "What's up?"

"We heard," Sam said cryptically, pulling up a stool and sitting next to Daniel. Teal'c remained standing, hands behind his back, and his face impassive.

"About?"

"The 'conduct unbecoming' charge," she elaborated. They had actually heard about it yesterday but hadn't found either Daniel or the colonel to ask them about it. "What happened?"

"It was just the NID trying to get back at Jack," Daniel explained, partially telling the truth. "Unfortunately for them, they only had rumours to work with."

"Thank goodness." Sam looked at Daniel with concern. Something was troubling him, she could tell, and she wondered whether it had anything to do with Makepeace's behaviour towards him. "Are you okay about it? I mean, this will add fuel to the rumours."

"I know." Daniel rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I'll be fine. I'm still trying to make sense of everything, you know, and with Makepeace trying to cause trouble..."

"Wait, it was Colonel Makepeace?" Sam blurted out. She hadn't thought about where the allegation had come from.

"Yeah." The linguist looked at Sam. "Didn't you know that?"

"We did not, DanielJackson," Teal'c replied, finally speaking up. He had been observing his little brother's expressions and body language, and determined that there was much more to this than was being said.

"Oh. Well, he did."

Sam then thought of something. "Daniel, was this just to get back at the colonel or was it aimed at you as well?" Daniel just stared at her, face blank, and she realised that her theory the other day was looking very possible. "Did he...?"

"It was nothing, Sam." He asked her with his eyes to drop the subject.

In an abrupt change of subject, Teal'c suddenly asked, "Did O'Neill apologise for his behaviour?"

Daniel looked carefully at Teal'c to try and determine what he was thinking. "Yes, he did." He still couldn't believe how eloquent Jack had been.

Teal'c nodded slightly in approval. He was pleased that O'Neill had done so, so that the two men could now begin their relationship. He still did not understand this world's prejudice against it but he would keep their secret.

Sam grinned. "I wish I could have heard that. Did he actually say the 's' word?" She had noticed the reluctance of the colonel to voice the word 'sorry' on many occasions.

"Uh, several times actually." Daniel's grin matched hers. "Didn't you feel the Earth stop spinning for a moment?"

"Was that what that was?" They hadn't joked like this since before Edora, so it was good to see that things would get back to normal. "You should've taped it - it would have made great blackmail material."

"Next time," Daniel promised. "Except Teal'c and I would have to use it on your behalf to save you from a court-martial."

"It would be worth the court-martial." Sam reached over and hugged Daniel, changing the subject at the same time. "If you ever want to talk..."

"Thanks, Sam." Talking to Sam about his experiences wasn't high on his list of things to do but he appreciated the thought.

After a bit more of a chat, and an offer from Teal'c to meditate in the Jaffa's quarters whenever he wished, they eventually left Daniel to his work. His spirits had been lifted by his friends' visit, and he was grateful that they had made the effort to come around, something he had neglected to do recently. Although he had Jack now, he had to remember that he had two other members in his SG-1 family and that they were worried about him too. So he would have to make time for them and do his part in getting the team back together. Maybe a team night was in order.

~~~~

"I've been thinking," Daniel said as he and Jack sat down for lunch in the commissary.

"Why am I not surprised?" Jack commented. He had calmed down slightly after the gym session but there was still some anger there so his words came out a little clipped.

Daniel just shot him a patient glare then continued. "I think we should invite Sam and Teal'c around tonight. A sort of re-bonding thing."

No way. Jack had plans for later and he didn't want to put them off, especially when he recognised this as a stalling tactic. "Friday night is hockey night, Daniel."

"So?"

"So, we haven't had a traditional hockey night in three months. I want to see the game, catch up on what's been happening, without interruptions." Of course, that wasn't the reason but they couldn't talk about that at work.

Daniel was sceptical. "You've had the last three Fridays at home, why didn't you catch up then?"

"I had other things on my mind." Like rejecting his best friend so that he could go undercover for their allies. He might have had the hockey on but he definitely hadn't been watching it.

"They were upset too, Jack."

"I know." He hadn't missed seeing that.

"Then?" Daniel didn't know why he was pushing this... actually, he did. He didn't want to be alone with Jack now that the other man had read what had happened to him. Jack seemed somewhat angry and Daniel was afraid that it was directed at him.

"I just don't want a lot of company tonight, Daniel." Jack was getting a little annoyed.

"Maybe I should just stay home then." Daniel ducked his head and looked at the table. He couldn't cope with being rejected again.

"No, I..." Jack bit off what he was going to say. "Your company is fine. I just don't want a crowd. How about we all go out somewhere tomorrow night, okay?"

Daniel nodded, still not looking at Jack. "I take it you read the report."

"I'm not going to get into this discussion now, Daniel." It wasn't safe. "Leave it till tonight."

Fear settled in Daniel's stomach as he nodded again. Maybe he shouldn't have written it because at least Jack had loved him while he didn't know the details. Now that he did, did he still want Daniel?

~~~~

Pulling up into the driveway of Jack's house, Daniel had some misgivings about being there. Somehow, having Jack know exactly what had happened made him feel worse instead of better because now Jack would see him differently. And he didn't want that.

Makepeace had made him feel humiliated and scared but now Daniel could add guilty to the list. Guilty because he was the one who had encouraged the colonel by flirting a little with him while knowing exactly what Makepeace wanted to do to him. Maybe if he hadn't done that, he would have been left alone and would not have had to endure Makepeace touching him all over. It was all his fault.

Daniel walked up to the house, guilt cursing through him. He had led Makepeace on and he had paid the price. And now he was damaged goods, someone who couldn't be touched without tensing up. Jack wanted to make love with him and Daniel was barely past the stage of being kissed without feeling scared. No matter what Jack said, he wasn't going to wait forever for Daniel to get over this. Why would he want a faulty boyfriend when there were plenty of others out there who wouldn't have any problem in sleeping with Jack?

The older man knew something was wrong as soon as he opened the door and saw Daniel. The linguist's body language was guilty and his eyes filled with self-reproach. Daniel had obviously decided to blame himself for everything. "Come in." Jack stood back, allowing the younger man to enter, and getting a good look at the black van still watching his house.

Daniel stepped into the house and waited until Jack had closed the door before saying, "Are you angry at me?"

"What for?" The question had come out of nowhere. Jack walked down into the living room, leaving Daniel to follow.

"For letting Makepeace... touch... me." Daniel wrapped his arms around his chest. It was so hard being there, knowing that Jack knew.

"For starters, you didn't let him do anything," Jack corrected, clenching his fists at the thought. "And secondly, no, I'm not angry at you. I'm angry at him for trying to take advantage for you and for making you feel like this."

"Then why haven't you touched me since you read... it?" Daniel's voice was tinged with sadness.

"You just got here, Daniel!" Jack knew he shouldn't be taking his anger out on the linguist but Daniel was just so frustrating sometimes.

"So?" He supposed it had been unreasonable of him to think that Jack might - just might - draw him into a passionate embrace and tell him that it didn't matter what had been done to him.

Jack saw a hint of that in Daniel's eyes and kicked himself for not thinking of that. But his mouth was operating independently of his brain. "For cryin' out loud, Daniel, what do you want me to do?! At the moment you freeze whenever I touch you but you expected me to sweep you off your feet when you arrived?" He stopped abruptly, knowing that yelling was only going to make things worse.

Daniel glared at Jack with tears in his eyes, hating him for being logical; that only made things worse. "Actually, I didn't expect anything, Jack! I hoped that you would still look at me the same way you did before... but you can't, can you? All you can see is someone who was nearly raped by another man!"

"Dammit, Daniel, that is not what I see!" Venting was good, and it had made the linguist finally acknowledge the near-rape. It nearly killed him to see those tears though. "What I see is someone who is hurting deeply over something that was not his fault, no matter what he thinks! Someone who I couldn't protect and who I love more than anything else in the universe but who doesn't think highly enough of himself to understand that he doesn't deserve to feel this way!"

The anger inside Daniel started to dissipate at those words. "It wasn't your fault, Jack," he stated after a few moments.

"And it wasn't yours," Jack said equally as calmly, bringing his hands up to cup Daniel's face. "Makepeace wanted to control you. He wanted to make you scared. He didn't understand you so he wanted to hurt you. He's the one who was at fault."

"He nearly succeeded," Daniel whispered. "I was so scared of being alone with him." Tears continued to prick at the back of his eyes, some of the moisture gathering at the front.

"You don't have to worry about that any more," Jack promised. "He can only hurt you now if you let what he did to you come between us." He looked deep into the clear but damp blue eyes, holding Daniel's gaze. "Okay?"

"I'll try." He would definitely try. For Jack.

"Good." Jack drew Daniel into a slow kiss, subtly encouraging the younger man to explore his mouth. He silently exulted when he felt the soft lips start to move against his own. As Daniel continued to gain confidence, Jack slowly increased the passion of the kiss without letting it get out of control. He felt Daniel's hands curl around his biceps, holding Jack to him.

When Daniel was as relaxed as possible, Jack gently drew back from the kiss. He wanted to try something but needed the linguist to trust him. "You taste so good... although I think you need to cut back on the coffee."

"Ja-ack," Daniel protested with a shy smile. He hadn't been kissed like that in a long time. It had made him feel so good, he had temporarily forgotten about his problems.

The colonel chuckled and released Daniel's face, wrapping his arms around the young man's waist. "Now, Daniel, I want to try something, a sort of sensory substitution thing, okay?"

That didn't sound good. Daniel immediately started to tense up. "I don't know..."

"Relax." Jack rubbed his hands up and down Daniel's back, trying to calm him. "You'll be totally in control. If you want me to stop, then I will. What I want to do is replace some of the bad memories with some good ones."

Daniel thought about that for a moment. "Is this how you got over it?"

Jack nodded. "It helped. Except it was with Sara, not my shrink." He grinned and received an answering smile.

"And you'll stop if I say to?" Daniel trusted Jack completely but just wanted to make sure.

"Yes. So, you ready?" He waited for Daniel's nod before leading him over to the wall. "Remember, I'm not going to hurt you," he said as he slowly backed Daniel against the wall.

Daniel swallowed hard, his eyes filled with involuntary fear. He recognised that Jack was re-enacting the first attack where he was pinned against the wall. Although he knew he was safe, Daniel started breathing faster, his heart matching the pace. He felt Jack's body lightly press against his and he had to consciously fight the panic that was rising inside him. He could stop this at any time he wanted but he also knew that he had to get through this.

Jack felt the quick rise and fall of Daniel's chest against his own and hated that he had to do this. He put his hands on the wall next to Daniel's shoulders to keep his balance, and took deep, even breaths to encourage the linguist to do the same. "Relax, it's only me," he said, holding Daniel's gaze with his own. He waited until the linguist's panic had receded.

"How long did it take you before you could... you know?" Daniel asked, referring back to Jack's experiences. He wanted something else to concentrate on.

"A couple of months," Jack replied. It had taken that long for him to get used to being touched by his wife, and even longer to accept a friendly hug from his comrades. "Don't worry, you're doing fine."

"If you say so." A couple of months??

Jack chuckled. "I say so. Ready for the next step?"

Daniel nodded. He closed his eyes as Jack claimed his lips again, trying to focus on what Jack felt like. His lips were strong yet soft, slowly moving against his, teeth gently pulling and tongue exploring. He'd never been quite so thoroughly kissed and he was definitely enjoying it. So much so that even the pressure of Jack against him barely registered. His panic disappeared and he started to become aroused. He slid his hands around to hold onto Jack's waist, pulling him in a little bit.

Being so close to Daniel, Jack immediately felt the hardness against his own. Struggling to control his primal instincts, he tried to keep everything gentle, even though his body screamed with want. Daniel's erection was proof that the linguist was enjoying the kiss and wanted Jack but the older man knew that it wouldn't be enough to help Daniel through sex. Still, maybe it might help a little, Jack thought as he slowly moved one hand downwards and put it over Daniel's groin.

Daniel immediately reacted by trying to pull away, Makepeace's leering face appearing in his mind. "No..." he protested against Jack's mouth.

Jack pulled back slightly. "Do you want me to stop?" he asked, concerned. He had felt Daniel freeze and he didn't want to push things any further if the linguist was uncomfortable. He gently stroked Daniel's cheek, encouraging the young man to open his eyes. "Daniel?"

Slowly, Daniel opened his eyes and accepted Jack's warm gaze. He pulled himself back from the brink of panic; he couldn't believe he had reacted that strongly to the touch. "I'm sorry." He felt so ashamed.

"It's okay." Jack kept up the stroking, trying now to reassure Daniel that he had done nothing wrong. "You have nothing to be sorry about. It's a natural reaction." And he should know.

Daniel felt tears come to his eyes again and he tried to blink them away. "I don't want to be scared of this. I want you."

"I know." Jack planted a quick kiss on the tempting lips and then drew away from Daniel. "We won't let it win." He laced his fingers through Daniel's and then led him a few steps over to the couch. They sat down, Jack's arm going around Daniel's waist, hugging the younger man to him.

Daniel cuddled up to Jack, still feeling slightly ashamed but now it was partly because he had thought that Jack wouldn't want him. Jack had been through this before; of course he wouldn't reject Daniel because of it. "You didn't let it win."

"I almost did," Jack admitted. "I didn't want to admit what they'd done to me, and I felt dirty and ashamed. I thought Sara wouldn't love me anymore and I tried to push her away."

"But she wouldn't let you," Daniel guessed, hearing the parallels between Jack's experience and his.

"No, she wouldn't."

"Did I ever tell you how much you helped me get through what Hathor did to me?" Daniel asked quietly. Even after two years, he still felt sick every time he thought of her.

"No," Jack replied. The fact that Daniel had still allowed Jack's casual touches after the rape had spoken for itself. All he had done though was been there for Daniel, letting him know that there was someone to talk to if he needed to tell someone, and had treated him exactly the same as before.

"It meant a lot that none of you treated me any differently. You didn't hate me. Teal'c taught me to meditate, which helped me sort through my feelings, and Sam..." he trailed off, smiling.

"What?" Jack was curious now. What had Carter done to help Daniel? He hoped it wasn't anything like he was doing now.

"She hugged me a lot but I think she was more uncomfortable than I was." He had the feeling that Sam had never really been a hugger until she had met him. "None of you let me feel guilty."

"Glad to have helped." Jack rested his head on the top of Daniel's, which was conveniently resting on his shoulder. "But this time you don't want them to know."

"I think they've worked it out," Daniel replied, his hand absently drawing circles on Jack's firm stomach.

Jack nodded. Teal'c would have been on high alert anyway, and Carter, well, she had learnt to read Daniel well enough over the years, especially when it came to the 'I'm not fine' body language. "Are you okay with that?"

"Not entirely," the linguist said honestly. "But there's nothing I can do about it now, is there?"

The older man assumed that was a rhetorical question. He put a hand over Daniel's, stilling its movement. At the puzzled look he received, Jack stated, "Don't start something you're not going to finish." He needed all his self-control and it didn't help that Daniel was 'exploring'.

"Oh. Sorry." Daniel was still embarrassed by the fact that he was able to make Jack aroused.

"It's okay. So, you staying over tonight?" Jack was hopeful, even knowing it was a bad idea.

Daniel, unfortunately, knew the same thing. "I can't." He had also seen the car. "And I have to work tomorrow to catch up on all that time I spent on the Tollan appeal."

Jack heard the faint accusation in the tone of voice but didn't react to it. "Ah. And tomorrow night, I take it we're having Teal'c and Carter over?"

Daniel nodded. "We haven't been a team for a while. I figured this was a good start." And it would give him something else to think about.

"Good thinking, Spacemonkey." Jack didn't miss the wince when he used the special name. That had hit a nerve. "Daniel?"

"What?"

"Never mind." Knowing how the name featured in the rumours, he could make an educated guess about how Makepeace had used it. "Sunday?"

"Okay." That would give him a day to get ready and psyche himself up. Grateful that Jack was going to all this effort on his behalf, Daniel reached up and kissed him, mindful that he had to keep it brief. "Thank-you."

Jack didn't say anything, just squeezed Daniel's waist. He just hoped that he was going to be able to get Daniel through this without making things worse.

~~~~

The next day at six o'clock found Daniel still working hard in his office. He had cleared some of the artifacts from his desk and was presently working on a difficult translation. It had been easy to take his mind off things by working, especially since Jack hadn't dropped in to annoy him. Okay, that was actually more annoying than if the colonel had come by but that was beside the point. The point was that he hadn't had any distractions.

"Hey, Jackson."

Until now.

Daniel looked up to see Taylor and Miller, two marines from SG-3, standing in the doorway. SG-3 - Makepeace's team. Oh, this was not good. Don't let this escalate, he told himself. Teal'c would be by soon. "Yes?"

Sergeant Taylor casually strolled into the room and advanced towards the archaeologist while Corporal Miller went around the desk to box the linguist in. "Your boyfriend arrested the wrong person."

"Jack's not my boyfriend," Daniel stated, acutely aware that the marines were much stronger than he was.

"Sure he is," Taylor continued, stopping right next to Daniel and looming over him. "Even the NID think so. But the point is, Colonel Makepeace isn't a traitor, and O'Neill arrested him."

"Well, you should be talking to him then, or General Hammond, not me." 'Come on, Teal'c, where are you?'

Miller hauled Daniel to his feet and kept a strong grip on his upper arm. "We're talking to you about it. See, we believe it was your fault."

"What?" They had to be kidding him! How did they figure that? "I didn't even know what was going on!"

"Don't play dumb, doctor. O'Neill would have told you," Taylor growled, removing the linguist's glasses and placing them carefully on the table.

"Uh, well, he didn't." Daniel figured this was just an excuse anyway, a justification for beating him up. He didn't know how Makepeace had done it but the colonel had made good on his threat. "He didn't tell anyone. So I'm afraid you'll have to ask Colonel O'Neill why he arrested Makepeace."

The marines ignored him though and talked to each other over Daniel's head. "I reckon the colonel turned Jackson down, so he went crying to loverboy with some story in revenge," Taylor speculated.

"Sounds about right to me," Miller agreed. "You know what the punishment is for that, Jackson?"

Daniel could take a wild guess but he remained silent. Where was Teal'c when he needed him?

He doubled over, winded by the fist that landed in his stomach. Although he had been expecting to be hit, he hadn't been ready for it.

"Same as it is for fags," Taylor answered, grinning in satisfaction. His well-placed uppercut knocked the linguist backwards into the bookshelves. He and Miller then advanced on their victim.

Daniel tried to avoid as many blows as he could but since there were two attackers, too many punches were getting through. And the more pain he was in, the harder it was to move. He collapsed to the floor after he was kicked in the back of the knee, and he curled up, trying to protect as many sensitive places as possible. But the blows kept coming, raining down on his back, buttocks and legs, as well as to his head. Just before unconsciousness claimed him, he thought he heard someone calling out...

~~~~

Teal'c walked through the SGC corridors on his way to DanielJackson's lab. He was looking forward to the 'team night' as there had not been one for quite some time. He would use the opportunity to judge the interaction between O'Neill and the scholar to ensure that everything was progressing well.

As he drew near to the office, he could hear several dull thuds. Concerned, he quickened his pace and finally entered the open door. The sight that greeted him was not one of joy.

"Stop!" he ordered, stepping forward towards the two marines.

The men turned and saw him, assessed the new threat, and fled. No-one in their right mind would take on Teal'c, even if they outnumbered him.

Teal'c didn't bother giving chase; he knew who they were. Instead, he immediately went over to the linguist, who was lying, unmoving, on the floor. Checking that DanielJackson was still alive first, Teal'c gathered the scholar into his arms and carried him to the infirmary.

~~~~

Jack stepped out of the shower, wrapped a towel around his waist, and then picked up the telephone, which had been ringing insistently for at least a minute. "O'Neill."

[Colonel, it's Carter.]

"Carter," Jack interrupted. "Don't tell me you're cancelling on tonight?" he said jokingly.

[No, sir. You have to come to the base immediately.]

"Why?" He was enjoying his day off.

[It's Daniel.]

~~~~

After trying to break the land-speed record in getting to the base, Jack raced into the infirmary. It wasn't hard to figure out where Daniel was - the rest of SG-1, Fraiser and Hammond were all crowded around his bed, hiding the linguist from view. He quickly walked over to join them, and his heart constricted at the sight of Daniel lying there, several darkening bruises standing out on his pale face. "How is he?"

"He'll be fine," Janet answered, glancing at her watch. The colonel must have sped the whole way. "There's a lot of bruising but nothing serious."

'Nothing serious'. Two marines tried to beat the life out of his linguist and all Janet could say was that the injuries were nothing serious? Oh, wait, that was supposed to be a good thing. "Do we know why this happened?" Jack asked, trying not to think of Daniel's warning.

"Not yet," Hammond replied. He had a few theories though. "His attacker's aren't talking and Doctor Jackson hasn't woken yet."

Jack rounded on Janet. "I thought you said his injuries weren't serious? Being unconscious for at least," he checked his watch, "thirty minutes after being beaten up counts as pretty serious in my book!" He prayed that nothing in Daniel's thick skull had been damaged, as well as thanking whoever was listening that the injuries hadn't been worse.

"Colonel!"

At the general's sharp tone, Jack tried to reign in his anger and concern. He wouldn't do Danny any good by getting kicked out of the infirmary. His voice was much calmer when he spoke again. "The two that did this... they were on Makepeace's team, weren't they?"

Hammond nodded as he made part of the connection.

Jack rubbed a hand over his face, trying to remain calm. "Daniel said Makepeace threatened him with this if he said anything." A glance at Carter and Teal'c confirmed that they had guessed what he meant.

"How would he know?" Sam asked.

"Because Doctor Jackson wrote an official report on the colonel's actions, and the NID would have informed him of it," Hammond replied.

"He still couldn't have told his team about it," Sam continued. Something didn't add up. "Maybe they were just angry and picked Daniel as their target."

"My fault..." a quiet voice interrupted them, the words mumbled.

"Daniel!" Jack was relieved to hear the linguist's voice. He immediately moved into Daniel's line of sight, his hand unconsciously grabbing hold of his love's in a gesture of reassurance. "If you didn't want to come tonight, you could have just said so," he said lightly.

"Sorry," Daniel muttered, blinking rapidly as his eyes adjusted to the bright lights of the infirmary. "When did you get here?"

"A few minutes ago."

Janet interrupted then, moving forward. "How do you feel, Daniel?"

"Stupid question." He tried to take a deep breath but cut it short when his ribs protested. He was hurting all over, especially his back and face.

"On a scale of one to ten?"

Daniel contemplated that. There were no sharp pains, just a lot of aches. "Six."

Janet nodded. That was a good sign that nothing was broken. She checked him out of signs of concussion, then asked, "Do you want anything for the pain?"

Daniel shook his head. He could cope with it.

"Your fault?" Jack picked up the conversation again. "How could this have been your fault?"

"That's what they said," Daniel said, drawing strength from Jack's presence. "They thought I'd set Makepeace up and that I knew what you were doing." He accepted Sam's hand on his arm and turned his attention briefly to her, then looked back at Jack. They - Taylor and Miller - hadn't listened to him because they hadn't wanted to hear the truth. They thought he was gay and had wanted to show him what they thought about him staying and Makepeace leaving; the 'set-up' accusation had been an excuse.

Jack caught a hint of that in Daniel's eyes but didn't say anything. Why hadn't he acted sooner to prevent this from happening?

"The cowards have been apprehended," Teal'c stated solemnly. He regretted not turning up sooner to prevent the attack from taking place.

"Thanks, Teal'c." Daniel now recognised the voice he had heard as he'd lost consciousness. Good timing as usual, he thought. He tried to smile but it came off as a wince.

"Time for Daniel to get some rest," Janet interrupted again, coming back over with some sleeping pills to help Daniel sleep. She encouraged him to swallow the pills with the aid of a glass of water.

"Can I stay for a few minutes, doc?" Jack asked quietly after everyone else had left. He didn't want to go just yet.

Janet assessed the colonel's concern and decided to let him stay. There was no harm in it, and Daniel would soon be asleep anyway. "Just for a few minutes."

"Thanks." He waited for Fraiser to leave, then turned his attention onto Daniel. "I knew I should've come in today."

"Wasn't your fault, Jack." Daniel realised that they were still holding hands; what would everyone have thought about that? "They looked up to Makepeace and were angry because I stayed and he didn't."

"That would apply to everyone on base," Jack pointed out, holding Daniel's hand tightly. He was so angry.

"But I was apparently the only one sleeping with you," Daniel replied, getting a little drowsy. He closed his eyes, knowing it was safe to sleep while Jack was nearby.

Jack didn't say anything, just watched Daniel drift off to sleep. He released Daniel's hand and placed it over the linguist's chest, then stood there watching him for a while longer, anger boiling within him. Those marines were going to pay for what they did to Danny, especially as the linguist was innocent of everything he had been accused of. No-one hurt Daniel and got away with it.

With a final loving glance at the sleeping man, Jack strode out of the infirmary. He would be back later but right now he needed to hit out at someone - specifically the two marines with a death wish.

~~~~

When Janet made her final round at ten o'clock, she found the colonel sitting at Daniel's bedside watching the archaeologist sleep. He appeared to be deep in thought so Janet walked quietly towards the bed.

"Define 'nothing serious'," O'Neill's voice startled her as she walked up behind him.

Janet didn't answer immediately as she checked on Daniel's vital signs. She felt the colonel's eyes on her the whole time but she ignored them for as long as she could and concentrated on her patient. Daniel looked so fragile, the bruises on his face standing out against the pale skin. No wonder the colonel was so concerned.

Jack waited for an answer. He had been sitting there for over two hours just staring, his mind going over the events of the evening, trying to work out if there had been any possible way of preventing the attack. So far, he hadn't come up with anything. His presence at the base probably wouldn't have prevented it; the marines would have just chosen their time extremely carefully. Of course, the NID turning up to investigate his and Daniel's supposed relationship wouldn't have helped, just serving to confirm the rumours about Daniel's sexuality and making him a visible target. Given all that, there probably wasn't anything that he could have done to prevent the attack from happening. And that was extremely frustrating.

"Bruising to the face, ribs, spine, buttocks and legs," Janet finally answered the colonel's question. "There's no broken or cracked bones, no cuts and no internal bleeding. If Teal'c hadn't interrupted when he did, it could have been a lot worse."

"He's been through enough recently," Jack observed. "Why do this?"

Janet didn't say anything, recognising that the colonel didn't really want an answer.

"And the irony of it is that Daniel hasn't done anything. He didn't know what was going on, he didn't set Makepeace up, and he's never slept with me." The last bit just slipped out before he could stop it. "But he's more vulnerable than the rest of us and what better way to send a message than show us we can't always protect him." He had got that point loud and clear, whether the marines had acted for the NID or not.

Janet rested a hand on the colonel's shoulder. He was going to blame himself, as he always did when Daniel got hurt. "It's not your fault, colonel. You weren't to know this was going to happen."

"Daniel knew. He was right. He always is."

"Colonel, it was a coincidence. Feeling guilty about it isn't going to help you or Daniel." She was guessing that the linguist already had enough mental scars to cope with. "Now, go get some rest. Daniel will be fine."

Jack shook his head. He wasn't going to leave.

Janet sighed. "Colonel, do you think it's wise to stay with the rumours about you and Daniel at the moment?"

He knew she had a good point but that didn't change the way he felt. "I'm not letting him go through this alone."

"I will remain also," Teal'c stated from the doorway. He had arrived in time to hear the last part of the conversation.

"See," Jack said to Janet. "Nothing to gossip about." Besides the fact he had held Daniel's hand earlier but no-one who had seen it would gossip.

Janet looked at the two men. She had a feeling that nothing she said would move them from the infirmary. This had been a personal attack and they were all taking it very hard. "Make sure the two of you get some rest then," she ordered.

Jack mumbled an assent while Teal'c merely nodded. One of them would keep a vigil at all times.

When Janet had left, Teal'c moved to stand on the other side of the bed so that he faced O'Neill. "Is this wise, O'Neill?" he asked, knowing the reasons behind the attack.

"Not you too," Jack groaned. He was well aware of how his actions could come across but couldn't bring himself to actually leave. "The damage has already been done, Teal'c; the NID saw to that."

"Do you believe ColonelMakepeace ordered the attack?"

"Not directly, no. But I'd say he knew what his team's opinion of Danny was, and what effect rumours of an investigation would have on them." He had drawn that conclusion after talking to the two marines. "What better way to get back at both of us?"

Teal'c thought that over. "I believe you are correct," he said eventually. "Do you believe there is still a threat?"

Jack shook his head, not taking his eyes off Daniel. "Not once word gets around about Taylor and Miller." How dare they blame his archaeologist for everything! He reached out and ran the back of his hand over one bruised cheek. Daniel looked so young lying there, so fragile, yet Jack knew that there was a strong soul within. But how would he cope with this latest abuse? Would he push Jack away or accept help in defeating the power it could hold over him? Only time would tell.

~~~~

Daniel woke slowly, his mind sluggish from the sleeping pills. Even before he opened his eyes, he could tell it was still night by the absence of sound.

He opened his eyes, quickly adjusting to the dim light. Turning his head to the side, he could see Jack on the next bed, sound asleep. Daniel was touched that the older man had stayed with him all night, especially considering the rumours that could arise out of the gesture. It showed that Jack still loved him in spite of everything.

The linguist turned onto his side, all his new bruises making themselves known. Memory of the assault came flooding back to him: booted feet viciously kicking soft body parts; fists landing on his face, and knocking the air out of his lungs; and crude words describing what they thought of him. And he hadn't been able to stop them.

A doubt appeared in his mind, taunting him with the possibility that this was what would push Jack away but he didn't listen to it. If that was the case, then Jack would have gone home or at least to his quarters on base. If Jack didn't really love him, Daniel doubted that he would have persisted in establishing a relationship in the first place. Not too many people in his life had taken the time to do that, and most of them had put their needs ahead of his. Granted, Jack was trying to help him so that they could have sex, but he wasn't being pushy about it. He always stopped when asked to and hadn't made Daniel feel bad about that. All the guilty feelings came from the linguist himself over the fact that he wasn't able to be intimate with Jack.

Daniel wrapped his arms around his waist, feeling the guilt flooding back. Maybe he should save Jack all this trouble and end things before anything else could go wrong. It almost seemed like they weren't meant to be together. But Daniel didn't think he could live with the distance he would have to put between them. So where did that leave him?

"Hey."

Jack's softly spoken greeting startled Daniel out of his thoughts. He hadn't noticed Jack waking up but now he looked into the warm brown eyes and smiled. "Hey." The guilt started to fade as he saw, even through the dim light, the love in Jack's eyes.

"Been awake long?" Jack asked, taking in the body language. Daniel had obviously been awake long enough to get worried about something.

"A few minutes." Daniel uncrossed his arms and tucked one hand under his head, the other resting on the bed to help him balance. "What time is it?"

Jack held his watch up close to his face to see the numbers. "Uh... oh four hundred." He'd had a little less than five hours sleep. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay." The stillness that surrounded them didn't encourage lying. "I've been worse."

"Don't I know it," Jack grumbled. "Is it any wonder I'm going grey?"

"It suits you." Daniel thought it added to the overall sex appeal that Jack exuded.

"Guess I won't dye it then." Jack got up and went over to Daniel's bed. The linguist rolled onto his back, creating space so Jack could sit down next to him. "I'm sorry I wasn't there earlier." He rested his left hand lightly on Daniel's right hip.

Daniel put one hand over Jack's. "We've been through this already, Jack." He was acutely aware of the hand on his hip and the older man's leg pressing against his side, his senses still on high alert.

"I know. I guess I'm still in shock." Jack moved his thumb over the younger man's hipbone, taking comfort from the soothing action. "You know I still love you, right?"

Daniel nodded but was a little worried. "Should you be saying that here?" What if someone heard?

"Only Teal'c's nearby - everyone else is sleeping." Jack leaned down and kissed Daniel firmly on the lips. "And there's no cameras in here either."

"In that case, I love you too," Daniel responded, pulling Jack down for another kiss. Strangely enough, it felt easier to do that in the infirmary than off the base. The rest of the guilt disappeared as totally different feelings flooded through him.

Jack pulled back gently when he started to get hard. They couldn't let things get out of hand on the base. "Save that thought for when we get home."

Daniel sighed, reluctantly giving in to reason. "That's going to be a fair while, isn't it? We'll be watched by everyone."

"By some people, yeah. But they'll lose interest pretty quickly. By the way, you and I are going fishing on Friday." He needed to get Daniel away from work to somewhere more peaceful.

"Really?" Fishing didn't really sound like that much fun and... Daniel looked at the too-innocent expression. Of course; they wouldn't actually be fishing, would they?

"Really. Naturally I'll invite Teal'c and Carter but since they won't be able to come, it'll just have to be the two of us." He grinned down at Daniel. "No-one else for miles."

"In Minnesota, no-one can hear you scream," Daniel responded dryly, eliciting a chuckle from his partner.

"Thanks for the warning. Now," Jack quickly kissed Daniel again, cutting off the linguist's protest. "You should probably get some more sleep so that Janet will let you outta here tomorrow." He ran his fingers lovingly down the side of Daniel's face, noting the way the linguist leaned into the touch.

"Thank-you for being here, Jack," Daniel said, guiltily admitting to himself that he liked the older man looking after him. He had been independent for so long, he had forgotten what it was like. Content and feeling much better about everything, he closed his eyes and started to drift off to sleep.

"You're welcome," Jack said softly, a lump forming in his throat at Daniel's seemingly innocent words. 'Thank-you for being here'. The archaeologist had obviously been having doubts again and Jack's presence must have eased them for the moment. Where else would he have been though, if not by Daniel's bedside? As scary as the thought was, there wasn't anywhere else he'd rather be.

~~~~

On Janet's orders, Daniel took the next two days off. He worked from his apartment but spent too much time staring blankly at nothing, just thinking. He used that thinking time to sort out exactly what he wanted - which was Jack - and how he could go about defeating his fears.

Sam and Jack both dropped in to visit on Sunday but on Monday, Daniel was all alone; even the NID car watching his place was gone. He tried working but eventually threw down his pen in disgust. He just couldn't concentrate.

Getting up from the couch, he headed into the bathroom, stripping off his t-shirt as he went. Looking in the mirror, he forced himself to look at every bruise, cataloguing them in his head as a warning of what would happen if he and Jack weren't circumspect at work.

Closing his eyes, he ran his hands lightly over his chest as he tried to imagine what it would be like when they finally made love. Would Jack continue to be as gentle as he had been so far or would he lose control completely when aroused? The linguist trusted Jack not to hurt him physically but he was a little scared about what Jack might actually be like, not to mention the actual act of love. How much would that hurt and how soon would Jack want to do it to him? And would Jack let Daniel do that to him? Daniel had the suspicion that he might get the answers to those questions on the weekend.

Breaking off the caress, he sighed, his aroused state dissipating as the doubts re-entered his mind. The trip to Minnesota was going to make or break their relationship, Daniel knew that instinctively. With all the sexual awareness between them, it was likely that their friendship wouldn't survive a return to its former state. Which meant that he had four days to psyche himself up for a weekend of intimacy.

Or be prepared to lose Jack forever.

~~~~

Over the next three days, Daniel's feelings went up and down like a yo-yo. When Jack was nearby, as he often was at work, it was easy to believe just how much the older man loved him. But when Daniel was alone, especially at night, the doubts came creeping back.

He was very jumpy on the base, something his fellow team members didn't fail to notice. Sometimes he felt that everyone was watching him, judging him, and were just waiting for an opportunity to do something to him. So he spent a lot of time in his office, mostly only venturing out if he was in the company of one of his friends.

Jack spent a lot of time at the base gym working off all the anger he felt every time he saw Daniel shy away from anyone who walked past. Most of the anger was directed at Makepeace and his team but part of it was at Earth's allies, and also at himself for not being there to protect Daniel. He also hated the fact that he couldn't support Daniel on the base as a partner should. The best he could do was a hand on the shoulder or back, maybe ruffling the hair occasionally, and of course just hanging around Daniel's office to annoy him. He wanted to do so much more but couldn't. And they hadn't spent any of the evenings together, Daniel citing a need to think as the reason for the space. Jack respected that as all the bad stuff had happened to the linguist but he wanted to be there for Daniel. He wanted to tell Daniel that he knew what he was going through, that he knew about self-doubt, about wanting to be away from people, about the fear of opening yourself up completely to another person and giving them the ability to hurt you deeply. But he waited, knowing that he would have a chance in Minnesota.

They had a six-hour mission on the Friday, a 'collect the samples'-type mission where they could regain their balance as a team. Daniel quietly helped Sam with collecting the samples while Jack and Teal'c patrolled the perimeter. Jack had to admit he spent an awful lot of time watching Daniel, partly because he was concerned about the archaeologist, and partly because he just loved watching Daniel.

The linguist was well aware of Jack's eyes on him, and the part of him that wasn't tired was excited. He could feel the desire in those brown eyes from all the way across the clearing and his body couldn't help responding to it, tingling wherever Jack's gaze lingered. Daniel tried to concentrate on the soil samples but often found his attention wandering.

After a couple of hours, Daniel decided he should have a word with Jack so he went over to where the colonel was currently located. "Stop it, Jack," he whispered as soon as he was close enough.

"Stop what?"

"I can feel you looking. How am I supposed to concentrate?" he complained.

Jack grinned, totally unrepentant. "I'm just enjoying the scenery, Daniel." The scenery was ever so much better up close, even though one could then see the faded yellow bruises.

"Well, stop it. Sam's already worrying enough about me and I don't want to add to that," Daniel hissed. He realised how closed he was standing to Jack and took a step away.

"Sorry," Jack said, not sounding sorry at all. "She's just concerned about you, Daniel. You haven't been your usual self this week."

"Really." Daniel's voice dripped with sarcasm. "I wonder why."

Jack looked at the crossed arms, took in the attitude, and wisely didn't respond to that. "You know you're cute when you're mad."

"Ja-ack!" Daniel was torn between annoyance and embarrassment. 'Cute'? "You're supposed to be proving that you can be my team leader and my lover, remember?" The words were said quietly. "So far, this isn't very convincing."

'My lover'. Jack was encouraged by those words. It meant that no matter what Daniel was going through at the moment, he was still considering them to be a couple. However, Daniel did have a point - Jack was supposed to be acting like a professional, not a teenager with a crush. "I'm sorry." This time he meant it. "I won't look. We're still on for this weekend though, right?"

Daniel nodded. He was still apprehensive about it but was beginning to look forward to spending a whole weekend with just Jack.

"Sweet. Now, you'd better get back to Carter - she's beginning to look worried." He couldn't blame Carter; Daniel had been withdrawn these past few days. They all knew why but it didn't make it any easier.

Daniel did as he was told - for once - but snuck a look over his shoulder at the colonel who was unashamedly watching the archaeologist's rear. He sighed. It had been worth a try. And he knew that Jack wouldn't be behaving that way if there was any hint of danger around. Still, he would have to make it clear to Jack that ogling him on SGC time was not acceptable.

He looked back at Jack again, who had turned away to do another perimeter check. Daniel found his eyes glued to the sight of the lean body moving casually towards the trees. He watched the movement of Jack's rear until he became aware of the colonel's eyes on him.

Jack had stopped and turned his head to look at the younger man, catching Daniel staring. He smiled wolfishly, receiving a blush in return, and then walked away, pleased to note that Daniel seemed to find him attractive.

For his part, Daniel couldn't believe what he had just done. He had watched Jack and had been caught by the man himself. Oh, that was so going to inflate Jack's ego.

"Daniel?" Sam stepped up beside her friend, curious as to what he was thinking. She noted the blush and the startled look, and looked towards where the colonel had just gone into the woods. There were some dots there that she didn't want to connect, not just yet.

The linguist jumped at the sound of Sam's voice so close to him. How much had she observed? "Yes?"

"You okay?"

"Fine." He went back over to where they had been working. He was going to be just fine.

~~~~

"Are we there yet?" Daniel mumbled as he slowly woke up. He had been fine on the flight but as soon as they had got into the car to drive the rest of the way to Jack's cabin, he had drifted off to sleep. Daniel hadn't realised just how tired he was until then.

"About another ten minutes," Jack replied, taking his eyes briefly off the road to look at his companion. Daniel had looked so peaceful when he was asleep, not to mention young and innocent. It was times like this that Jack found it hard to believe just how much Daniel had been through. Not to mention he felt a bit like a cradle-snatcher but that was another matter entirely.

"Jack?" Daniel decided to raise a question that had been playing on his mind.

"Yeah?"

"Is this forever?"

Jack knew exactly what Daniel meant. "Oh yeah. Face it Danny, you're stuck with me," he said, a big grin forming. "Never gonna let you go."

"But what if I can't...?" He broke off, embarrassed. "You know."

"You will," Jack assured him. "But even if you can't, I still want to be with you. I love you - get that into that thick skull of yours." He took one hand off the wheel and grasped Daniel's hand, squeezing it tightly.

Daniel squeezed back, somewhat reassured by the contact. "I'm beginning to." As he had observed recently, Jack really did care about him a lot and if the older man said it was love, then who was Daniel to argue? He should grab Jack while he was available.

"Good." Jack gave Daniel's hand one last squeeze then put his hand back on the wheel.

The remainder of the trip was spent discussing trivial matters, Jack wanting to keep Daniel's mind occupied so that he didn't think about what they would be doing later on. Occasionally he reached out to the younger man, patting or stroking a hand or thigh, whichever was closer at the time. He had been so circumspect these past few days that he just couldn't help himself.

Daniel jumped slightly the first time Jack touched his thigh, mainly because he wasn't expecting it. The second time he smiled shyly at Jack, feeling the strong fingers squeeze him in response. The third time, he placed his hand over Jack's and laced their fingers together, wanting to keep the contact.

Jack brought their enjoined hands to his lips and kissed the back of Daniel's hand, then rested their hands on his thigh. Just because his new partner was a man, didn't mean he was going to cut out the romantic gestures; besides, Daniel would tell him if he was uncomfortable with it.

Surprised, Daniel stared at Jack with wide eyes. The romantic gesture was something he hadn't expected, and he was moved by it. It meant that Jack felt confident enough in Daniel's company to let that side of him show.

"Do you mind?" Jack asked after a minute of silence.

"Should I?" Daniel had the vague feeling that he should have protested at what was stereotypically a heterosexual gesture but since he wasn't a stereotypical anything, he didn't. The little he knew about same-sex relationships was that one man was usually more 'feminine' than the other, and he hoped that Jack didn't have that view because if he did, then the older man would be in for a shock. Daniel would not play 'the little woman' for anyone. But he didn't mind being pampered or held by someone who loved him.

"I don't know," Jack responded, releasing Daniel's hand and making the turn onto the dirt road that led to his cabin. He risked a quick glance at Daniel to see if he could tell what the linguist was thinking. Daniel's expression was thoughtful, which could mean anything. "But I should warn you now that I can apparently get very mushy - Sara's word, not mine - at times."

"Consider me warned." Like he didn't already know that Jack was a pushover! Daniel looked out the window and took notice of the scenery for the first time. He smiled in appreciation. "Jack, this place is beautiful." All the trees that surrounded them, and a little log cabin up ahead in the clearing, were the stuff fantasies were made of.

"I'm glad you like it." Jack pulled up in front of the cabin and then got out of the car, taking a deep breath of the fresh air. Yep, this place was definitely the best on Earth, and now he was about to share it with the person he loved the most.

They took the bags inside, Daniel curiously exploring the cabin. There were two bedrooms but he guessed that Jack would insist on sharing. The open fireplace would warm the living/kitchen area, and he noticed that there was a small bookshelf in the corner of the room that was piled high with old fishing magazines. It had a very homey feel to it and Daniel relaxed because of it.

"I'll just get the fire going," Jack announced from the open doorway. "It'll get cold tonight. Just make yourself at home." He headed off to his woodpile.

Daniel retrieved a book from his bag, removed his shoes, and then went to sit on the couch. He tucked his legs under him and started reading. By the time Jack came back in, he was already engrossed in the text.

With an indulgent smile, Jack lit the fire and then made some hot chocolate. It was fairly late, and they had eaten before they had set off in the car. He wandered over to the couch and held out one mug. "Daniel?"

"Hmm?" Daniel absently replied before his sense of smell overrode his brain. He accepted the mug, querying, "Hot chocolate?"

"No caffeine before going to bed," Jack mock-scolded. He had other plans on how to keep Daniel awake if things went well. "It's not good for you."

"Yes, mom." Daniel turned to face Jack as the other man sat down on the couch. This was as good a time as any to raise another question. "You really like looking after me, don't you?"

Jack felt that he really couldn't deny that; he loved looking after Daniel. "Yeah, I do." He gathered up the linguist's legs and encouraged the younger man to stretch them over his lap. Daniel obliged, and Jack promptly started stroking them. "I can't help it."

Daniel settled back against the arm of the couch, finding the stroking soothing. "I noticed." He took another sip of the hot chocolate. "Is it alright if I look after you too?"

"Go right ahead," Jack said happily. He very much wanted to be on the receiving end of Daniel's TLC. "As I've said before, we do what we're comfortable with, and we let the other person know if we're not comfortable with something."

"Okay."

The next few minutes were quiet as they both finished their drinks. The air around them started to get heavy with desire as Jack continued to stroke Daniel's legs but neither of them were ready to take it any further at that point. Just being together was good.

Finally Daniel broke the atmosphere, reaching forward to put his mug on the coffee table. He then moved himself a little closer to Jack, removed his glasses, and said, "Want to make out?" He wanted to kiss Jack so badly right now.

"Oh yeah," Jack replied, putting his drink down. He wound one arm around Daniel's waist and used the other hand to hold the back of the linguist's head. Their lips met with an urgency that hadn't been present before, their mutual desire fuelling the kiss.

Daniel rested one hand on Jack's shoulder and the other behind his neck, holding the older man in place. He was a little scared by the passion of the kiss, which was somewhat similar to how drugged-Jack had kissed him, so he tried to focus on the sensations that were flooding through him. Desire was building inside him and he was getting hard. His skin tingled where Jack caressed him; even Sha'uri hadn't made him feel this turned on. He pressed closer to Jack, feeling the hard chest against his own. His lips parted more, allowing Jack to slip his tongue between them and explore his mouth.

He was so aroused that he almost didn't notice when Jack's hand slid downwards. Daniel didn't want to tense up, he really didn't, but his body reacted automatically.

Jack didn't remove his hand but he did withdraw from the kiss, moving back far enough to see Daniel's face. "You okay?"

Daniel opened his eyes and looked at Jack, seeing nothing but love, concern and desire there. "I'm sorry." He had been doing so well; it wasn't fair that he was reacting this way.

"Hey, it's alright." Jack caressed what he could reach of the firm buttocks, carefully observing Daniel's reaction. "Just relax."

The young man rested his forehead against Jack's, his eyes tightly closed again as he tried to stop the memories getting through. He tried to relax but Makepeace's voice intruded, repeating 'I'm going to take you right here' in that lust-filled tone of voice he had used. Daniel gripped the back of Jack's shirt tightly, trying to force the voice out of his mind.

Not wanting to put Daniel through too much pain, Jack stopped the caress and wrapped his arm around the linguist's back, holding him gently. "I'm sorry, Danny, I'm sorry," he whispered.

Daniel slowly released his grip on the shirt and took a few deep breaths. He was such a baby to react like that! He should be able to do this - damn Makepeace for making him unable to! He felt tears burning in his eyes, ashamed of his inadequacies, and had to bite back a sob of despair. He wasn't going to cry over this, he wasn't!

Jack correctly interpreted the sound Daniel made and cradled the young man's head on his shoulder, stroking the short hair. "Let it out, Danny, I've got you." He held on as Daniel finally started crying. Tears came to his own eyes; his own feelings of remorse, guilt and anger were bubbling just below the surface. He suppressed them, needing to be there for his partner.

They remained locked together for several minutes until Daniel needed to breathe. He pulled back from Jack, retrieved the handkerchief from his pocket, and blew his nose.

Loudly.

"Romantic soul, aren't you?" Jack teased gently as he looked into red-rimmed eyes.

Daniel blew his nose again in response, chuckling in spite of himself. "Thanks," he said, not brave enough to look at Jack yet. He was even more embarrassed that he had cried in front of Jack.

"You needed it," Jack replied, tilting Daniel's head up so that he could plant a kiss on the swollen lips. "You've had a lot to cope with recently. It's not good to bottle these things up."

"Thus speaks the voice of experience," Daniel said dryly, although his voice was still a little shaky.

"Exactly. Never argue with your elders." Jack wiped his thumb over Daniel's right cheek, brushing away the tears. "And speaking as your elder, you'll get through this."

"Especially with a pushy, overprotective colonel to help me, right?" Daniel's embarrassment started to fade away during the exchange, which was exactly Jack's plan.

"How'd ya guess?" Jack grinned. Caring for Daniel was his mission in life. "Now, I recommend we both get some sleep. We've got lots of fishing to do tomorrow."

"You're not actually going to fish, are you?" Daniel had thought that was just an excuse to come up here.

"Of course I am." They had to do something in between all the make-out sessions. Jack hustled Daniel through to the bedroom where they both proceeded to get changed and then used the bathroom separately.

Daniel was already in bed when Jack exited the bathroom. He had claimed the right-hand side and was just lying there, watching the older man. Jack slid into the bed beside him and pulled the archaeologist closer to him, one arm lying across Daniel's stomach. "You're the first person to share this bed," Jack confided.

"What? What about Sara?" Daniel turned slightly onto his side to face Jack better.

"She didn't like fishing so she never came up here." For a while that had hurt. Then her absence had been welcomed. "I used to bring Charlie up here sometimes but after he... I got rid of the old bed and got a new one."

That wouldn't remind him of Charlie, Daniel thought, touched by what Jack was sharing with him. He reached out and tentatively stroked Jack's face. "I'm honoured." He was. He was sharing a part of Jack's life that no-one else but Charlie had.

"You should be." Jack captured Daniel's hand and planted a kiss on the palm. "Not get some sleep," he ordered.

"Yes, Jack." Daniel lay back down, his face towards Jack, and obediently closed his eyes. He felt Jack's arm rest on his stomach again, and Daniel rested his arm over the older man's. Then he drifted off to sleep, secure in Jack's love.

~~~~

Jack let the coffee talk for him as he knelt next to the bed. The linguist's cute nose sniffed, one blue eye opened to verify the smell, then the other one followed.

"Coffee?" Daniel asked groggily, pulled from his sleep by the smell of his favourite food.

"Only if you're very good," Jack said playfully, moving the cup out of the linguist's reach. "But you'll have to get up first."

"Ja-ack," he protested. He was sure that it was too early to be getting up. Daniel buried his face in the pillow while deciding whether the coffee would be worth it. What was he thinking - coffee was always worth it! He rolled over onto his back while waking up enough to co-ordinate getting out of bed.

"Good morning." Jack thought Daniel looked beautiful in the morning with the short hair sticking up everywhere, not to mention the sleepy expression. Was it any wonder he had fallen in love with this man? He leaned over carefully and kissed the younger man, lingering for a few seconds.

"Mm-hmm," was all Daniel could respond with. He was feeling thoroughly content after a good night's sleep. He had woken up only once during the night, safely cocooned within Jack's arms, and had gone back to sleep almost immediately.

"I love it when you're articulate." Jack placed the cup on the bedside table and then stood up. "Breakfast will be ready when you are."

It took Daniel ten minutes to arrive out in the kitchen area, sipping his coffee. He had changed but his hair still had that ruffled look about it. He settled himself down on the stool near the bench and looked over the food that was laid out in front of him. How hungry did Jack think he was? "Have you eaten?"

"Some." He'd had some toast while his linguist was still sleeping. "I thought I'd give you the Chez O'Neill breakfast experience." Jack put the last of the toast on the bench and then sat down next to Daniel.

"There's no end to your talents," Daniel commented as he started eating.

"You ain't seen nothing yet," came the promise.

~~~~

Four hours later found Jack relaxing on the dock in his comfortable deck chair, fishing rod in hand. Daniel was lying on his stomach on a rug not too far away, lost in his book. They had been like that for the past few hours, the silence only occasionally shattered by small talk. Mostly they were happy just to have each other nearby.

Jack looked back at Daniel, pleased to see him so relaxed. He had the feeling the linguist hadn't really relaxed for months. Should he risk some contact that might upset Daniel again or just let things lie, so to speak, for a while longer? He kept staring as he thought it over, and of course the longer he looked, the more aroused he became. Eventually the fishing was forgotten and Jack abandoned his chair to walk up beside Daniel. There was no indication that the linguist had noticed him so he knelt down over his lover and nuzzled the side of his neck.

Daniel arched his neck in response, immediately becoming aroused. He had been aware of Jack's presence but had decided not to show it as it was more fun that way. With Jack's stubble scratching the smooth skin on his neck, Daniel found that he had just discovered a new erogenous zone. "Jack," he half-moaned, half-protested, forgetting all about his book.

"Shh, busy." Jack savoured the taste of Daniel's skin, this being the first time he remembered doing it. He was very careful not to leave a mark because explaining that on Monday would be difficult. He broke off the nuzzling and shifted off the linguist. "Turn over, Danny."

The young man did so and Jack then straddled him again. He removed Daniel's glasses, then captured his wrists, leaning back down to explore the vulnerable throat.

Daniel hadn't minded turning over because he wanted to see Jack, not to mention be an active participant. He could feel their erections nudging against each other, sending shocks of pleasure through him. But as soon as Jack took hold of his wrists, suddenly it wasn't as pleasurable any more. This was too close to what drugged-Jack had done to him. He twisted his wrists, trying to convey to Jack that he didn't like it but Jack was too preoccupied to notice. "Jack!"

The older man glanced up and was startled by the look in Daniel's eyes. What was he afraid of? This hadn't been in his report. "What's wrong?"

"Let go," Daniel asked, flexing his wrists again.

Jack immediately released them and sat back, worried that he had done something wrong. "Daniel?"

"It was... that was what you did to me when you were... influenced," Daniel explained, reaching out to rest his hands on Jack's thighs. "Don't you remember?"

Jack shook his head. "I didn't realise."

"It's okay," Daniel reassured him. "I just don't like being held down."

Idiot, Jack berated himself. He should have known that after all that had happened. "Do you want to stop?"

"No. Just don't do it again." He smiled tentatively up at Jack.

"I promise." Jack leaned down to kiss Daniel on the lips, this time placing his hands either side of the archaeologist's head. He felt Daniel's hands slide up his sides underneath his shirt to hold onto bare skin. Balancing his weight on one arm, Jack undid his shirt buttons, giving Daniel a lot more skin to explore. He moaned appreciatively as the talented fingers glided over his skin. Breaking contact briefly, he sat back, got rid of his shirt, and then kissed Daniel again.

This is weird, Daniel thought as his fingers ran through Jack's chest hair. It was so different to be feeling a masculine chest instead of a feminine one. He arched his neck back again as Jack shifted his mouth to suckle the sensitised skin, and at the same time, pushed his groin up against his lover's.

Jack responded by rocking against Daniel, groaning at the pleasure it created. This was more like it, he thought. But there wasn't enough skin involved so he rolled them both over so that Daniel was on top, then gathered up the edge of the t-shirt and pulled it over the linguist's head.

Daniel sat back on his haunches and blushed as Jack's eyes proceeded to devour him hungrily. He knew that he wasn't looking his best - some of the bruises were still a dull yellow - and he didn't think his body was that fantastic anyway. Jack's, on the other hand, was fascinating. He moved forward so that he was now straddling Jack, and he traced over the hard muscles of Jack's stomach with his fingers.

Jack held onto Daniel's hips as the younger man curiously explored him. He could tell that Daniel would be an extremely sensuous lover because he loved to touch. When the linguist leaned down to kiss him, Jack shifted his grip so that he was holding onto the smooth buttocks. He felt Daniel flinch but the younger man kept on kissing, obviously wanting to go further this time; Jack would be only to happy to oblige.

He slid one hand between their bodies and undid the top of Daniel's jeans. When there was no protest, Jack unzipped the fly and then slipped his hand under the briefs.

Daniel gasped as Jack held him intimately, new sensations flooding through him. His whole body tensed with the shock and he dropped his head to rest on Jack's shoulder as he tried to control his panic.

"Just relax, Danny, it's okay," Jack crooned into Daniel's ear, his other hand coming up to stroke the linguist's back. "I'm not going to hurt you." He felt Daniel's erection wilt a little with the shock but he kept stroking it, silently exulting when it began to firm up again.

When Daniel let out a deep breath, Jack knew that the younger man was over the worst of the panic. He rolled Daniel onto his back and quickly stripped him, then took his own trousers off also so that they were both naked.

Daniel took in the sight of a naked Jack with wide eyes, his breathing faster than usual. He was aroused and terrified at the same time. Here they both were, naked, outdoors, about to make love.... and he had no idea how they were going to do that! He focused his gaze on Jack's face - the one part of the colonel that was totally familiar to him - and tried to control his breathing. I can get through this, he told himself.

Jack feasted his eyes on Daniel's naked body. He was just so beautiful. There were a couple of fading marks on his torso but Jack ignored them, concentrating on the rest of him. "God, you're beautiful, Danny," he whispered reverently.

Again Daniel blushed; love was blind so of course Jack would say that. But it was still flattering - even if it was somewhat embarrassing to be lying there open to Jack's inspection.

Lying down on his side, Jack turned Daniel in to face him. He ran one hand down the linguist's side, over the hip, and down the thigh before encouraging Daniel to shift one leg over his for balance. When they were settled, Jack moved his hand back up and stroked Daniel's face. "How are you doing?" He didn't want to push the young man too far.

"Okay," Daniel stated, hyper-aware of all the places they were touching. He was still nervous but he didn't want to disappoint Jack. "I think." He tentatively rested his hand on Jack's waist, uncertain of what to do.

"You're doing fine," Jack assured him, amazed that Daniel had let him get this far. "Better than fine. But if you want to stop at any time, tell me."

Daniel nodded his agreement but wasn't planning on following that order. He needed to get through this now; by allowing himself to get naked, he was committed to following this through, otherwise he would keep running away from it. "I want to do this." He trusted that Jack wouldn't do anything that would hurt him.

"Sweet." Jack drew Daniel in for a deep, lingering kiss. When Daniel started responding eagerly, Jack moved his hand down over the linguist's body and settled it on one soft globe. He pulled Daniel closer so that their groins were rubbing against each other, and he hissed with pleasure.

Daniel closed down the part of his mind that was freaking out and tried to concentrate on how Jack felt against him. All that heat and hardness... it felt strange. He gripped Jack's waist harder, getting caught up in the desire, and unconsciously he began to rock against the older man. Jack pushed back and soon the two of them were spiralling towards release.

A few minutes later, both men lay gasping for breath, completely satiated. Jack rubbed small circles on Daniel's back, soothing away the tremors. He couldn't believe that they had finally made love! After everything that had happened, they'd finally done it! A smile slowly spread over his face until he was grinning like the Cheshire Cat. He had actually made love - he wouldn't demean it by calling it sex - with Danny.

Daniel was having similar thoughts although his included a little more shock. He had just had sex with his best friend! Or was it 'made love'?; he didn't know how to classify it. Part of him was overjoyed that he had got through it but another part was quietly freaking out. He tucked his face into the crook of Jack's neck so that he wouldn't have to look at his lover. Jack had made his first time wonderful but Daniel couldn't say that he had returned the favour. He had basically just laid there and made Jack do all the hard work... he had just known he was going to be bad as this!

Bringing his hand up to cup the back of Daniel's head, Jack whispered, "I can feel you thinking, Danny." He nudged Daniel over so that his young lover lay on his back, and Jack then leaned over him slightly, one hand on the smooth chest. He could now see that Daniel was feeling very insecure, and decided to reassure him. "It's probably not a guy thing to say, but you were wonderful and I love you very much."

A shiver ran through Daniel as the gentle breeze cooled his heated skin. "I didn't do anything," he said softly, trying to avoid Jack's eyes.

Jack caught Daniel's chin with his fingers and encouraged the linguist to look at him. "Believe me, Danny, you did." He gently kissed the swollen lips. "So give yourself a break and stop freaking out."

"I'm not freaking out," Daniel automatically denied, even though he knew he was lying. His nerves were still tingling and his head still spinning, making thinking difficult. "I'm just..." he trailed off.

"Uh-huh." Jack ran his fingers through the sweat-spiked hair, a dopey grin on his face. Teasing Daniel was so much fun.

They both lay there for a while longer, recovering from their lovemaking, until they got cold. Gaining Daniel's attention, Jack suggested that they go inside and shower. Of course, he meant together but Daniel obviously didn't interpret it that way. Quick as anything, the linguist pulled on his jeans and headed inside, leaving Jack sitting there on the rug watching the rear view. He chuckled, amused at Daniel's modesty after what they had just done. Still, those little contradictions were part of why he loved the younger man.

Jack took his time getting partially dressed, checked on his fishing rod, and then went inside to get lunch organised, letting Daniel have some privacy. He decided on huge sandwiches to regain their strength.

Daniel returned before Jack had finished the sandwiches. He had changed clothes - the jeans had got a little sticky when he'd put them on - and had composed himself enough to face Jack again. However, he was still a little shy when he went into the kitchen. How did one act after making love with one's best friend? "Your, uh, your turn," he said hesitantly.

"Thanks." Jack touched Daniel's shoulder as he went past him towards the bathroom. He would have to make it a quick shower so he could get back to being with Daniel.

Five minutes later, Jack returned and sat down next to Daniel, close enough that their thighs touched. "Not hungry?" He'd noticed that the linguist hadn't eaten very much.

Daniel just looked at his new lover, not sure how to answer that. He switched his gaze to the sandwich in front of him, collecting his thoughts. "Thank-you," he finally said.

"For...?"

"Everything."

Jack slid an arm around Daniel's waist. "You're worth it," he replied. "You can't back out now; you're stuck with me for the rest of your life."

"Sweet." Daniel teased Jack by sounding depressed, an innocent expression on his face. Jack had proved over and over that he wasn't going to leave, and finally Daniel believed him. They were a couple, with everything that entailed. And so what if he wasn't good at the sex? He would soon learn, of that he had no doubt. His appetite - for food - restored, he took a large bite out of the sandwich.

Jack was thwarted in his revenge when Daniel started eating. Shrugging his shoulders, he went back to eating his own sandwich. He had plans for that evening that required a fire, a sheep-skin rug, and no clothes. Revenge wasn't always a dish best served cold...