As Janet left Cassie and Rebecca, she prayed that she would never have to go through another day like that one. Everything in her wanted to protect Cassie, and by extension therefore also Rebecca, from the harshness of the world, but she had not been able to do that.
She knew 'this' Cassie was not her real daughter - and in fact not even her 'real adopted' daughter, but since her arrival in this reality, and especially over the last few weeks, she had grown to love her as much as the 'first' Cassie. So watching her anguish as her lover was first abducted and then assaulted was heartbreaking for her.
At least they were all back safe, she told herself. And the perpetrators were all dead, though she was a bit vague on the details of exactly what happened. Sam would tell her later, she was sure.
Even during her examination of Rebecca, Janet's mind had wandered to Sam. She prayed that Sam was as little traumatized by her injuries as she had made out to Janet when she insisted that she tend to Rebecca. She knew that she had to have been in serious pain, but it did appear that the goon hadn't assaulted her sexually.
= = =
"How is she?" Janet came straight to the point as she stood at Carolyn Lam's office door.
"Janet, you look exhausted," Carolyn exclaimed. "Sit down before you fall down," she instructed, guiding her into a chair. "She's fine," she reassured her. "She's been banged about a bit, but she's going to be okay. Three broken ribs, another one cracked. Broken wrist, two broken fingers. She's going to be real sore for a while. We've wrapped her ribs, and set her wrist and fingers, they were clean breaks, so she should recover full mobility. She won't be playing guitar for a while though."
Janet grinned wanly. "That's okay, I don't think she's gonna worry too much about that; she's lasted 37 years without playing the guitar, another couple months isn't going to kill her."
"Just what I thought," Carolyn replied with a smile. "So how about you, Janet?" The new doctor was a perceptive woman.
"Not one of my ten best days," Janet admitted. "I never thought I'd have to carry out a rape examination on someone so close to me."
"And how is she?" Carolyn asked.
"Pretty traumatized, physically and mentally. I've never seen anything like that, even in books during training. It's kind of hard to believe that one human being could do that to another. Had to give her 13 stitches in all. A few of the cuts were quite badly infected. And the bruising was.. well, just about the worst I've seen on her thighs," Janet swallowed.
"Fever?" Carolyn wanted to know.
"Only mild, thank goodness," Janet told her. "I've got her on broad spectrum antibiotics, so that should deal with it. Given her Plan B too," Janet was referring to the 'morning-after' contraceptive pill, "working here you forget that not every woman has the contraceptive injection. Just hoping that doesn't make her feel worse."
"Not everybody gets the side effects, though, do they?" Carolyn wasn't as confident as she sounded. She knew the chances of Rebecca escaping without some nausea and abdominal pain were pretty slim. "Janet, I'm so sorry about everything. What a shitty week you've had."
"At least they're back, safe," Janet was touched by the younger doctor's concern. "That's the most important thing. Can I go see her now?" she just wanted to see Sam, to reassure herself that she really was going to be okay.
"Sure," Carolyn agreed. "She'll probably be waking up soon anyway, so a friendly face won't hurt."
Janet smiled her thanks, and made her way to the private room she knew held her lover.
= = =
Letting herself into the room, she took a sharp breath as she saw Sam's face. There was some bruising on the side of her face, probably from when she hit her head, but her colour was good and she was breathing without difficulty. "Oh Sam," Janet tried to keep her voice low. She drew a chair up to the side of the bed, and very gently took Sam's uninjured hand in her own. Sam seemed to sense this in her sleep, and squeezed her fingers. "You're safe," Janet whispered. "And you came back to me. Thank you honey, I couldn't do any of this without you."
= = =
When Carolyn Lam looked in on the two lovers an hour later, she was unsurprised to see both women sound asleep, Janet's neck at a painful-looking angle. She knew that Janet wouldn't leave Sam's side that night, so she withdrew, returning a few minutes later, wheeling another infirmary bed. "Janet," she put her hand gently on her shoulder. "It's alright," she reassured her as she awoke with a start. "Everything's okay. S'just your neck's going to hurt like hell tomorrow if you stay like that. I know," she saw the small woman about to demur, "you're not leaving, that's fine. I've brought you another bed, we can push it up right next to Sam."
Janet was moved by Carolyn's kindness. Tiredly she changed into a set of scrubs Carolyn had brought, and climbed onto the bed that was pushed up against Sam's. Sam stirred in her sleep, looking up groggily to see Janet right next to her. "Hey," she said softly.
"Hey yourself," Janet replied. "How ya doin'?" she tried to keep her tone light, wanting to keep Sam as relaxed as possible.
"Great," Sam said, and tried to move over slightly to get closer to Janet. She didn't expect the sharp pain from her ribs, and gasped involuntarily.
"Great, eh?" Janet's voice was teasing. "You are great though, hon. And you'll feel better soon. No permanent damage. You'll be sore for a while though."
"No kidding," Sam's voice was pained.
"You can have some more pain relief in a few hours," Janet had checked Sam's chart. "Next time you wake up."
"M'okay," Sam told her. "Nothin' a few hours sleep won't fix."
"May take a little longer than that, sweetie. But everything's gonna be fine, I promise you," Janet's confident voice was reassuring to Sam, who, now she had woken, was in much more pain than she had expected.
"How's Rebecca?" Sam didn't want to ask the question, but she had to know.
"Says you saved her life," Janet told her. "She thinks you're just terrific. She's right, of course."
Sam could spot an evasion at 20 paces, and Janet knew that. "Okay, she's not too good honey. Cassie's with her now. He did a real number on her, Sam, physically and emotionally. I've never seen wounds like that, leastways not inflicted by a human," Janet's voice shook with emotion.
Sam reached out and put her hand in Janet's, threading her fingers through her lover's. "I'm glad it was you with her, Jan," she told her huskily. "At a time like that, you need somebody who understands, who helps you to regain control. You're just the right person for that situation."
Janet's blood ran cold. Sam was a highly intelligent woman, but what did she understand about the aftermath of rape?
"Sam?" she asked. "Oh God, please tell me it's not true. Did he touch you?"
"No, sweetie," Sam hurried to reassure her. "I didn't give him a chance."
"Spill," Janet's voice was icy.
Sam realized she had been rumbled. "Oh honey, it was nearly 20 years ago. It's gone now, over. Forgotten."
"Why didn't you tell me?" Janet was distraught.
"It was so long ago," Sam hedged, "I didn't think it mattered." Janet stared incredulously. "Okay, so that's not true. Honestly? I told the 'other' Janet, and it nearly destroyed us. She couldn't cope with what had happened to me, for months she wouldn't go near me. Our sex life went straight down the tube. She thought I needed to be treated with kid gloves. It took me so long to reassure her that I wouldn't break if she went near me. So this time? This time I was a coward. I didn't want you to suffer in the same way that she did. I didn't want 'us' to suffer either. I'm sorry, Jan."
Janet was staggered by Sam's revelation. "Oh Sam, I'm so sorry you couldn't talk to me about it. I understand your reasons sweetie, I'm sorry I snapped at you."
"You didn't snap," Sam tightened her grip on her fingers. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it before. I guess I wanted to be a different person with you in some way, too."
"So what did happen?" Janet asked gently.
"It really was a long time ago," Sam told her. "In college. All the other students were older than me, 23 or 24. I was 18; he was my lab partner. He just wanted to control me, I guess. I wasn't interested in him sexually, and I think he'd figured that I was gay, though I kept very quiet about it then. So late one night in the lab, just the two of us and a computer... he, he, 'helped himself' I guess is the right expression. But I'm over it, Janet, I promise," Sam's voice was steady and clear. "But I remember how I felt afterward. And that's how Rebecca will be feeling, and worse I imagine; she was attacked repeatedly, with violence thrown in. That's gotta be worse."
Janet thought back to her times with the brutal Roger; Sam saw the cloud passing over her face.
"Roger?" Sam asked. Janet nodded. "Shit," Sam said. "Of course. We'll be okay, hon," she saw a tear slide down Janet's face. "We'll all be okay. Rebecca too; she's got Casssie, and Cassie's got us. If anybody can pull them through, we can." Sam's eyelids were drooping.
Janet nodded. "Damned straight we can," she pulled herself together. "We're a family. We stick together."
And she lay down next to her bruised and battered lover, carefully keeping hold of Sam's hand. She pulled the fingers to her mouth and kissed them tenderly. "We're all gonna be fine," she whispered, seeing that Sam had fallen off to sleep again. "Better than fine; we're all gonna be happy. Everything'll work out."